Have You Been Burned by Romance?

How My Daughter's Name Helped Me Understand Her Anorexia [EXPERT]

How we set ourselves up to get burned and how to heal.

     Romance is always a risk. We put ourselves out there, and hope that the other person will treat us gently.  It takes a brave and self-confidnet person to engage in relationships as we become vunerable.  Consider all of the people whom you know that are simply existing and not really living. They have about as much emotion as a doorknob on two legs as they lack passion for life. People who are simply existing don't have the capacity to take a gamble, betting on self that the relationship gamble is worth the risk.

     It is easy to be attracted to the person whom demonstrates similar characteristics to ours. For that part in us that we adore we can easy love in another. The problem comes from that part of us which we ignore due to not liking those aspects of self.  Those are the "cooties" that we all carry and project onto others.  When in relationship, we gently hand off our cooties and ask the other person to carry them for us. However, once that person stops carrying our cooties for us, we rebel by no longer liking that person. We are like the projector who throws the movie onto the screen and then gets upset when the movie is finished.  The solution? Recognize and accept all parts of us, the projector, the screen and the image we project as they are all complementary aspects of ourselves.

     In order to carry our own cooties, or those aspects of self that we wish weren't there and that others wouldn't notice, we must first become conscious of those aspects. The second step is to stop judging them as being wrong or bad as it is difficult to integrate into yourself those aspects of self that you still dispise.  By accepting all parts of ourself, we counterbalance our perceived negative characteristics with the ones we easily accept. Once we do that, we no longer require anyone to carry our cooties for us as our cooties will have been transformed. Thus, it becomes easier to get along with more individuals and to keep relationships.

     Each letter in each person's name indicates both gifts and challenges. Said another way, each letter indicates those aspects that are easy to accept and those that are harder, our cooties. Our names are normally balanced between the two which are complementary to each other. When these compliments learn how to balance each other our relationships become easier since once we can accept all aspects of self, it is easier to accept all aspects of another, thereby greatly reducing the risk of being in relationship. If you wish to know more about names and what your name indicates click here.