Photo: Getty
Follow these tips and put your tongue to good work.
By Sean Jameson — Written on Sep 17, 2020
Learning how to French kiss your partner is one of those intimate things that you absolutely must learn if you want keep things hot and fun.
By following the tips below, you'll learn exactly how to make French kissing (i.e., kissing with tongue) a fun experience for both of you.
Here's a step-by-step guide on how to French kiss (and use your tongue like a pro).
1. Prepare your lips for french kissing.
Before you even begin to think about french kissing your partner, make sure that you have enticing, kissable lips. That is arguably the least romantic kissing tip you'll read today, but it's also one of the most important.
If you have chapped, dry lips, make sure to regularly moisturize them to keep them soft and kissable. (And if you have cold sores, avoid kissing until they're completely done or you'll spread the virus to your kissing partner!)
2. Initiate the kiss by using body language and your eyes.
Before I get to the actual "how to French kiss" part, you must know how to initiate French kissing with your boyfriend (or girlfriend).
Lunge toward him and plant your lips on his if you like, but honestly, that's usually not the smoothest thing to do. Often, doing that will just freak him out, especially if you take him by surprise.
Instead, during conversation, make a lot of eye contact. Every once in a while, glance from his eyes towards his lips for a few seconds.
Very quickly, he will realize what's on your mind and know what to expect, so that when you do actually lean in for the kiss, he won't be caught off guard.
3. Create a build-up to the french kiss.
Rather than going straight to massaging your partner's tongue with yours, it's nice to have a little build-up. Start by tilting your head to the side just a little bit so that your noses are not in the way.
Then, gently squeeze your partner's upper lip between your lips for a few seconds, and then do the same with his lower lip. You can alternate between the upper and lower lip for a few seconds, or even a few minutes.
4. Use your tongue.
Next, it's time to start using your tongue.
From squeezing his lips between yours, tilt your head slightly further to the side and open your mouth a little more so that you can massage your partner's lips a little bit with your tongue. If he seems to like this, then continue to use your tongue more and more.
Next, try to extend your tongue a little more so that you can massage his tongue with it. If your partner is enjoying it, he will naturally be inclined to reciprocate and return the favor.
Just make sure not to extend your tongue too far, otherwise your partner may find it uncomfortable.
While French kissing your partner, you can put a number of additional tongue kissing techniques to use:
- Make a slow, circling motion around his tongue with yours.
- Slowly and gently press against his tongue with yours.
- Softly use your tongue to lick and tease his lips.
Alternate between all three of these techniques to add some variation to your French kissing repertoire.
5. Ease out of the kiss slowly.
When you want to stop French kissing your partner, the easiest thing to do is just pull away from them and stop, but that can be a little abrupt.
You may find it nicer to stop using your tongue and go back to the start by squeezing his upper or lower lip between yours before you pull away.
Repeat all of the steps above as you both desire.
Now that you know these basic guidelines for how to French kiss, here are two bonus kissing tips:
1. When French kissing someone, don't forget about your hands.
Sure, you can just wrap them around your partner and leave them there, but there are tons of other, really great things you can do with them, too. The easiest thing to do is to run them up and down his body, but don't stop there. You can also run them through his hair. The back of the scalp is one of the most sensitive and erogenous zones on the body, so make sure to use your nails and fingers to scratch it gently.
Putting a hand on his cheek as you change the side you are kissing them on is another hot, somewhat dominate thing to do while kissing them.
2. Go slow, especially with your tongue.
The second and final tip to remember is that you should never forget this: kissing someone more slowly is far hotter and more sensual than faster, washing machine-type French kissing.
More for You:
Sean Jameson is a sex expert and creator of the Bad Girl's Bible, a resource for women who are looking to improve their sex lives and have more fun with their partner.