Dream A New Dream When Life Happens

Self, Heartbreak

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”
~C. S. Lewis

Big things happen in life — your company “divorces” you, a loved one passes on, a cheating husband is caught — big things. Your world as you know it turns upside down and you lose all sense of well-being. You’re thrown off balance. You get knocked down by a curve-ball. Your old dreams are shattered.

These life-changing events will likely trigger a lot of emotion, such as fear, anger, blame, and grief, among others. When you feel these raw emotions, it can bring up a sense of insecurity, hopelessness, and wonderment about who you are now that things are changing.

A Life Transition

A transition is an event that causes us to re-evaluate our present circumstances and consider how we must adapt to the new normal. It causes us to change—profoundly.

Sometimes you can see these events coming and prepare for them. At other times, you can be blind-sided by them.

What I know for sure is that they keep coming, whether you want them or not, whether you’re prepared or not, whether you try to prevent them or not. That’s life.

It’s by grand design. I don’t know of anyone who gets through this life unscathed. It’s how we learn. It’s how we grow.

What Defines Us

If I’ve learned nothing else in my work, I’ve learned this: how we face these major shifts in our lives is what defines our character and makes each of us unique. It also defines how successfully we move forward.

Do you tremble at the first sign of change and resist it at all cost? Or, do you wobble at the impact at first, then quickly right yourself and move on? Maybe you welcome the opportunity that change offers you and look for the silver lining every time?

Everyone handles transition differently and depending on the magnitude of the change, you might tremble at one and welcome another. You may be able to handle the first one or two on your own, and when the next one hits you realize you’ve just been going through the motions.

It may be time to dream a new dream.

Dream a New Dream

Whether you like the change or not, accepting the new situation is always a good first step. You don’t have to like it. If you don’t want to stay stuck in limbo, accepting the fact that things are changing is a very mature way to move forward.

From that place, you can honor all the emotions that come up. Just because you’re accepting the change doesn’t mean there will be no emotions. Of course, there will.

You’ll still get angry—sit with that and let it work it’s way out. Choose how you want to feel instead. You may also feel scared. Learn to reframe the fear so it doesn’t stop you in your tracks. Loneliness may come up. Think of ways to fill your time so you minimize the lonely feelings.

Make plans. Act on those plans. Take small steps at a time and feel the satisfaction that comes with making progress.

I love what C.S. Lewis said … “You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

It reminds me, that my dreams may get shattered at times in my life, and I can always create a new dream. It’s a choice I get to make. I could wallow in the loss of the old dream or I could design a better one—one that suits my current vision. It also reminds me to never lose sight of my dreams. I get to set new goals and dream a new dream whenever life happens to me.

That’s a comforting notion.

Thriving Through Change

I believe when we set a firm foundation for those dreams, it will support us in many ways. Think of it as a three-legged stool on which you can sit and never topple.

Values—Vision—Passion for Action. When you are well grounded in what you value most for your life—and use those core values to guide every choice and decision—have a crystal–clear vision of what you want for your future—supported by those values—and act with passion to make the dream happen, you will turn coping and surviving into thriving.

That’s how you thrive through change. Simple, yes. Easy, no. And you get to choose the path you want to take. Is it time to dream a new dream?

If you answer YES to this question and you're not sure where to start, it may also be time to talk with someone who has been where you are and can guide you.

María Tomás-Keegan is a certified Life & Career Coach for Women, and founder of Transition & Thrive with María. When life events flip your world upside down, she can guide you to turn chaos into calm, so you can clear your head, step into your power and live life on your own terms. If you’re ready to explore new possibilities with an open heart, get 5 Simple Choices to Get You Back on Track now.

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This article was originally published at TransitionAndThriveWithMaria.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.