When Men Talk Too Much About Themselves On Dates

Love, Heartbreak

Here's my recipe for this situation, the next time it's hard to get a word in edgewise with a date or his showing off is bugging you:

  •  Find all the things you like, appreciate and/or admire about him and keep your focus on those things (it will make your date easier!).
  • Instead of feeling annoyed or resentful (if he's monopolizing the conversation), engage in the conversation and make sure you're adding to it, rather than just passively receiving.
  • Fight the "desirable women are a good audience" message if it's not working for you … after all, it's not his fault you bring that to the table.
  • Make sure you share things about yourself with him, so he feels you're interested — don't just sit there as the judge of whether or not he's going to "get it right.
  • If you're out with a man who really does insist on doing all the talking, practice the very important skill of choosing the best perception of why he's doing/being that — tell yourself something that inspires your best self (and dating is ultimately all about learning how to be your best self), even if you know you'd turn down an invitation to another date.

These are challenging times these days for anyone in the dating world, with both men and women trying to figure out the latest "right" ways to be. When you practice being  generous of spirit, even with men you'd never date again in a million years, both of you receive a gift. He's just like you in a very basic way: he's simply seeking love and acceptance.

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