Should You Stay or Should You Go?


When you're struggling with whether or not you should continue to date someone, here are some tests you can do on your situation so you can more effectively step away from your feelings and tap in to your inner wisdom. You already know the answers but our emotions, shoulds, other people's expectations, time invested, etc. can color our ability to know what's best for us.

1.Ask this question: Is this a man you would want as the father of your children?

This question takes the emotion out of it and helps to be very smart about what is the best choice.

2. Do a Ben Franklin: On a piece of paper, draw a vertical line down the middle. On the left side write all the things about him that make you happy. On the right side, write all the things that make you unhappy.

With each item, preferably in a light meditation, ask how each one makes you feel. Write it down. You will know if this is what you really want. (Download free MP3 meditation here: )

3. Ask yourself: If this is the way it will be the whole time I am with this man, do I really want this relationship?

You only know how it is now and you don't know if it is going to change. Something to consider seriously.

4. Do the Rocking Chair Test: Imagine sitting on your front porch in your rocking chair. You're very old, at the end of your life. Think about how you would feel if you stayed with this man...then think about how you feel if you decided to leave.

It's amazing how helpful it is to see it in black and white because it takes some of the emotion out of it.

Once you do these steps, you will be more confident in your decision.

You can learn the Secrets I discovered about men after researching them for two years at

From my heart to yours,
Kara Oh

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