Knowing When to Call it Quits

Love, Heartbreak

How can you tell when it's time to call it quits or whether your relationship can be saved?

     On the other hand, many relationships end when they could potentially be saved, as when:

1. Someone cheats. Last week I wrote about how to recover from an affair. It might not be easy, but it is certainly possible. You’ll probably need professional help to learn how to trust your partner again, and it may take some time. But it’s worth it in the end, because leaving the relationship won’t make your sense of betrayal disappear. Instead, it will resurface in your next relationship.

2. You’ve grown apart but still like each other. People naturally grow apart if they don’t take the time to work on their relationships. You’re not the same person you were when you first met, and your partner may have changed too. But by consciously connecting on a regular basis, you can rekindle the spark of romance. It won’t feel the same as it did when you first met, but it can still be a powerful connection. Make a weekly date night, make a joint bucket list, and talk about your hopes and dreams together.

3. You fight too much. It’s not true that people who fight a lot aren’t meant to be together. It just means that they haven’t learned how to express themselves and get their needs met. This one too may require professional help, but the dynamic can be changed. Some people (my daughter, for example) argue for the sheer sport of it. There are many communication skills you can learn to tone down the rhetoric of your arguments.  Check out some of my previous blogs for suggestions. 

This article was originally published at Romance Recovery. Reprinted with permission from the author.