Understanding Why You are Beautiful and Still Single


Stop searching for the wrong Mr. Right: Use your spirit

I met this beautiful co-host of a radio show last night, and after I introduced myself, she admitted that she was single and wanted some relationship advice. I had originally complimented her on the poise, professionalism and focus that she displayed during a very wild and crazy show. Although the show was crazy, she was the glue that kept it all together. I could clearly see that she had a wonderful spirit, so what was the problem? Why was she still single? 

At that moment the best advice I could give her, and that I give now to you ladies reading this, was to continue to invest in yourself, to be the best person you can be and to not always look for the man that society tells you that you are supposed to have. For example, "I am looking for a man 6 feet 5 inches tall, 230 pounds, with black hair—and he must play for the Lakers." Instead, be alert for the man who will work the hardest for you. Look for the man who knows how to run your bathwater, and who is conscious enough to add the necessary salt and minerals to baby your beautiful skin: "Honey, your bath water is ready and the temperature is 82.5 degrees Fahrenheit."

I believe Ms. Radio Show Host partially understood my words of wisdom, but later when I asked for her contact information, she stalled, and after a moment asked very politely why I wanted her contact information. She only gives it out for business; otherwise, she would have thousands of phone calls. Her hesitation made me pause and think for a moment. What had been a natural flow of events when networking now had me thinking, "Why do I really need her number?" On a deeper level, her hesitation is the main reason she is single, beautiful and sitting at home by herself without the love she desires. Her reasoning behind the question was, "How do I know that he will not be blowing up my phone?" I thought for a second and then responded that the only way I would ever, (and more than likely) not blow up her phone would be if she were an extremely nice lady and there was a mutual exchange of energy. Meaning, I am not the type to keep calling a woman who does not want to be bothered. She assured me that she is very nice, and after a moment, I disclaimed that I did not think I would need her contact information at the moment because there wasn't any immediate business that needed her attention.

Okay, now let's go below the surface. Here is the deeper meaning of what God explained to me hours later about why this beautiful woman, and so many like her, are still single. Matthew 13:14-16, in the 1970s Catholic edition of "The Way: The Living Bible," says, "They hear, but don't understand; they look, but don't see!"  Although I was standing right in front of her, she was as blind as a bat, and although I was speaking directly to her she was deaf and mute. When you only let the worries of this world influence you, which God advises against in Romans 12:2, it blinds your ability to see the real and living substance in the spiritual world and within yourself. Essentially, although she could physically see, she could only see the temporal things of this world. True love, which comes from within, is only recognizable when your spiritual eyes and ears are open. She could physically hear and see, but in actuality she could hear and see very little.

Ladies, if you seek true love, the perfect man will only be discernible through your spiritual eyes and ears. Yes, you may be saying to yourself, "But I don’t want a fat man!" But being fat is a negative image the world has put into your mind. It closes your spiritual eyes and ears to the truth of love. In actuality, I know we all desire the most attractive person we can find, which is perfectly natural and okay. But what I am trying to get you to see is that true love will only be found when your spiritual eyes and ears are open. True love is not something you can see, but a feeling that comes from within. True love is not something you can buy. Money and power are not true love or even true happiness, but true control over one's spirit, caused by the love of this world over the love of God. Always remind yourself that you are a spiritual being having a human experience; you are not a human being having a spiritual experience. The spirit preceded the body (Ecclesiastes 11:5) and the very reason you, a beautiful woman, are still single is because you are allowing your body to rule over your spirit, instead of your spirit ruling over your body.

The matrix is real, and thus we unknowingly live within it, with many of us never opening our spiritual eyes and ears to truly see and hear. As a result, many beautiful women suffer and remain unnecessarily without companionship. Here is an assignment: Throw your favorite candy into a dark room, and then go find it without turning on the lights. When you allow your body to rule over your spirit, you remain single because you are trying to find the man of your dreams in a dark room without ever turning on the lights. He cannot see you and you cannot see him. The man of your dreams could be standing in front of you, but you will never see or hear him, because your true eyes and ears are closed. The good news is that it does not have to be this way. Just like Bob Marley said: "Open your eyes and look within. Are you satisfied with the life you're living?"

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This article was originally published at How To Get The Man of Your Dreams . Reprinted with permission from the author.