Are You Causing Your Own Jealousy?


You may be surprised to learn that jealousy has a lot more to do with YOU than your partner.

Understanding the roots, triggers and reasons for our feelings of jealousy is an important part of maintaining a healthy relationship. To do this, we must be aware of the critical inner voices driving our uncertainties and self-doubt. If we can identify these thoughts, we can challenge them as the "smiling enemies" they are, the ones that want us to wind up alone. We can act against the thoughts that tell us to be suspicious, mistrusting and accusatory.

Though challenging these thoughts may initially make us anxious and may even intensify the voice attacks in the short run, in the long run it will strengthen us as individuals and improve our trust and communication with our partners. The more we weaken this internal enemy, the more we strengthen a positive sense of self. This will enable us to accept the reality that we are loved and reject the misperception that we are going to be betrayed. And if there were an infidelity, we would be much better able to get through it if we weren’t letting our critical inner voice get the better of us.

Read More About Relationships from Dr. Lisa Firestone