Is An Emotional Affair Less Dangerous Than A Sexual Affair?

Is An Emotional Affair Less Dangerous Than A Sexual Affair?

In a word, the answer is “Yes.” Women and men often disagree about this. Let me say that from a marriage counseling perspective, emotional affairs have just as much power to break up a relationship. Many men think that if they have not had sex, than they have honored the marriage vows and the wife should not worry.

Some men but not all, feel just as strongly about this as women. They recognize that the emotional closeness that the wife has shared with the other means much more than something that has been purely sexual. On the other hand both men and women, at times, cannot seem to get the image of their partner having sex with someone else out of their minds.

But women often feel even more hurt by an affair of the heart, when they realize that their partner has shared many deep feelings that are very intimate. For many woman the emotional closeness implies a much deeper relationship than if the relationship was just sexual.

The sense of being deceived hurts more when your partner has denied that anything of importance was going on. He may have just brushed it off as a necessary closeness that has happened at work. Your partner may describe as a great friendship. Yet you may have sensed that your partner has pulled back from you for awhile and now you know why. You may be staggered by the intensity of their closeness when you look at the emails and cell phone bills.

-Dr, Jim Walkup

Click for More Articles on Extramarital Affair Recovery by Dr. Walkup

Other Resources on the Web:

“The Impact of an Extramarital Affair on the Children:” From the New York Times 

“Infidelity:” Statement from the American Association of Marriage & Family Therapists 

“Chaste or Cheating?  The Difference Between Flirty and Unfaithful”-article from Lifescript: Healthy Living for Women 

As a marriage counselor and partner to his wife for over 40 years, Dr. Jim Walkup helps couples build their relationship to last a lifetime. Visit his website for a copy of his eBook "A Marriage Counselor’s Secrets To Making Your Marriage Sizzle". Or, if you're in the state of New York, to schedule a Skype appointment or an in-person office appointment, call 914-548-8645 or drop Dr. Walkup an email at jimwalkup@gmail.com

This article was originally published at Mid-Manhattan Marriage Counseling. Reprinted with permission from the author.