7 Secrets To Mastering Communication Secret #6 Collaborate

Love, Self

Improve your conflict resolution skills by learning how to collaborate without resentment and blame.

Welcome back to 7 Secrets To Mastering Communication!


“The secret is to gang up on the problem, rather than each other.”

~Thomas Stallkamp

Change. Do you thrive on it or relish the status quo? Either way, change is the one constant in life and in relationships that can wreak havoc if you’re not able to collaborate and  navigate through it without stress, worry and self-sabotaging talk from your Internal Chain of Command.

When one party grows at a different pace or events both unexpected and planned result in surprising consequences that we hadn’t imagined, there can be challenges and stress. Sometimes seemingly unequal situations can cause resentment and anger. Think of how professional changes, financial losses or emergency health issues can impact you and your relationship.

The relationship can still grow, but sometimes in an unanticipated direction and this can be threatening. When we learn to collaborate with our partner, we come from an open place of “What’s In It For Us?”  Conflict resolutions requires that each party accepts the other for who they are and where they are in life at that moment. Regardless of the curve balls life throws our way, when we collaborate, we always have our partner’s back.

Seeing the power in accepting change as a normal process in relationships and seeing that no matter where anyone is, each person can benefit when invited to be part of a collaborative solution. It can also mean letting your partner come up with his or her own solution and letting go of your agenda. This is where compassion comes into play, too. Remember we all have a higher self if we allow ourselves to hear its voice. We already have the answers within and collaboration serves to bring them out as a team.

4 Strategies For More Collaboration In Your Relationships

  1. Get a buy-in from your partner by setting up a time to talk in a non-threatening, non-judgmental way.
  2. Reassure your partner that they haven’t done anything wrong and that you just need or want to discuss something that is on your mind.
  3. Invite the other person to finding a solution together in a “What’s In It For Us” mindset.
  4. If it’s a heavy topic, how can you lighten it up? Discussing the heavy stuff doesn’t have to feel like a business talk. How can you set it up in a more inviting arrangement or place? What can you do after the talk for each other? Attention and affection go a long way here.

How do you collaborate in your relationships?

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To Cultivating Collaboration!


If you're frustrated at not being heard, feel like your needs are not being met, say "Yes" when you really want to say "No" and take things personally, then you should definitely contact me today about my innovative online Compatibility Index. In less than 60 minutes, I can tell you exactly why you are struggling in your conversations and give you tips and strategies for communicating your needs and desires confidently, elegantly and guilt-free!


This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.