Does Valentines Day Depress You?


Valentine's Day leaves many divorced women feeling depressed, lonely, depressed and jealous.

As Valentine’s Day approaches divorced women are wondering how they deal with it, a day that is devoted to romance and love.  Divorced women often report that their pain of loss increases as they are bombarded with images of hearts and flowers everywhere they look. They cannot even walk inside of a grocery store without seeing big white teddy bears holding large red heart candy boxes. To make matters worse, it appears that there are happy couples everywhere! Their friends and co-workers busily chat about their plans for the day.  Divorced women often describe Valentines as the worst holiday ever, depressing, lonely and hopeless.

Speaking to a skilled divorce coach often helps a woman to heal and to find some peace during the Valentine season.  Linda separated in late spring last year, and was dealing with feelings of rejection and loneliness. As Valentine’s Day approached, loneliness overwhelmed her. She felt unloved and feared that no man would ever love her again. She grasped to understand what was wrong with her. To top things off, she just heard through the grapevine that her soon-to-be-ex is showing up all over town with an attractive blonde-haired younger woman on his arm.

Linda spent her nights crying and depressed.  She did not want to leave her house and felt as if her entire world was crashing in around her – again. She was tired of feeling this way and desperately wanted to find closure and some inner-peace in order to get on with the rest of her life.  Her family and friends kept telling her, “Just get over it.” They did not seem to understand her suffering, which made her believe that she was totally alone. That is until she decided to contact a divorce coach.

Just after one session, Linda felt renewed and hope for a brighter future. Valentine’s Day did not seem so terrible once she changed her mind set about the day. She chose to think of Valentines as a day to celebrate her love for life and for others. Showing love on Valentines, or on any other day, does not need to be a romantic type of love. She began to see all of the things that she had in her life to be grateful for. It was as if a completely new world opened up to her that she never seen before. She began feeling excited about the possibilities that lay ahead of her. She began to see opportunities that had been there all along, that she had been unable to see.

Linda choose to celebrate Valentines, by making little heart shaped cards with a personal message on them to give to the folks at the local senior citizen home.  She realized that many of these people had long lost any dreams of romance and that they craved love. Many of the residents are very lonely and ready to welcome her into their world. She realized that one of the greatest joy’s in life is to share what you have with others.

Doing something nice for someone else can do wonders if you are feeling lonely on the day dedicated to celebrate love and romance. Make a list of everything that you can think of that you could do on Valentine’s Day that would show others that you love them. Here are a few to get you started:

  • Visit a nursing home, orphanage or hospital
  • Volunteer at a soup kitchen
  • Host a Valentines party at your home with singles
  • Host a kids Valentines party at your home
  • Take your children out on a special date
  • Make a special dinner for your parents
  • Serenade happy couples that you know
  • Have a night out with the girls

It is your choice on how you deal with your divorce. Know that you are not alone and find a trusted support group or coach that will be able to help you find a new normal and create a happy and fulfilled life.

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