Are You Waiting To Be Picked?


How one mental shift can attract the man, life, and career you desire.

Do you approach your life with a “waiting to be picked” outlook?
Let me explain (and by “explain” I mean--story time!)

I was doing some inner work that was really about deepening into my worth and the “sweet spot” of my biz. I was all blissed-out visioning the direction of my brand and biz in the next 5 years and getting super clear on the self-expression + service combo that is the “sweet spot” of success for me (more on that in another blog post). This inner work involved taking inventory of my Goddess-given-gifts and how they could serve more fully, which led me to think about one of my most beloved gifts-- my acting (a passion that I dropped and will actually be bringing back into my life and combining into my biz, so excited, you’ll see what I mean in the next 6 months). This led me to thinking about my days as an actress and what blocked me from success. Here’s the truth: I can rock it in acting. But what I can clearly see now is the common actor pitfall that held me back. It was the mentality of “waiting to be picked.” As an actor, you audition, you perform, and then you wait to hear back. You wait to see if you’ll be picked. And this mentality of “waiting to be picked” lowers your vibration. It lowers your expectations. And it allows you to take all that amazing power you have… and give it away. It allows you to give your power to a source “out there” versus wielding your power from “in here.” The world of Hollywood is a Spiritual journey. Just like the world of entrepreneurship is. And same goes for the world of dating.

How can I say that Hollywood is a spiritual journey?

Because the road of Hollywoodism and entrepreneurism asks us to get down to our truth. Fast. Do you believe that making money is hard? Do you believe you’ll get that role? Do you believe you can create money doing what you love? Will you follow the prescription that 99% follow? The prescription that says forget your desires, say NO to your purpose, and ignore your truth? Or will you “follow the call?” as Joseph Campbell says. If you choose to follow the call, will you stand strong in your worth and absolutely own your power to create the money, the love, and the life you want...or will you approach your desires with a “waiting to be picked” mentality? Cuz here’s the deal, when you’re waiting to be picked, you always end up… waiting.

I know.

Because I lived with that attitude in my acting days. Until I met a BRILLIANT friend. She said, “Why wait?”
I said, “What do you mean?”
She said, “Let’s go get the hottest agents in town to love us.”
To which I replied, “But we can’t get into their offices without a referral!”
She just looked at me as she picked up the phone and started dialing BIG TIME managers offices. One of the managers just happened to be Hally Berry’s manager. She told the guard dog (I mean assistant) that she was returning Mr. Cirincionne’s call. “Returning” as in he called us. The guard dog (oops assistant) rushed my friend through to speak with this manager. Well, needless to say, my amazing friend got us in… and the cool part of this story is that this manager actually ended up signing me. If my gf had a “waiting to be picked” mentality, I would never have gotten in to this office.
I share this with you and ask, are you waiting to be picked? In your business are you waiting to be picked for speaking gigs or with clients? In your love life are you waiting to be picked by the man of your dreams? When it comes to people you admire and would like to be friends with are you waiting to be picked?

And if so, how can you shift your perspective? Years ago, I had a BAM (that’s what we at the Bye Bye Good Girl headquarters call a BadAssMoment) that shifted my whole life view and of course changed my life. The BAM was; I no longer wanted to live from the place of “waiting to be picked.” Instead I wanted to live from the thought “They are lucky to have me.” That was the value I wanted to bring to the table. And so I did.

What mentality shift are you ready to have?
What gifts and beauty are you ready to bring to the table?

“Visionary women don't dream big, they dream BIGGER. Visionary women don't expect to get it perfect, they allow themselves to be messy. Visionary women don't play by the rules, they play by their passions. Visionary women don't follow logic, they follow intuition. Visionary women don't just say "why", they say "why not?" Visionary women don’t hide out; they make their entrance on stage. Visionary women don’t dismiss their pain, they share their story. Visionary women don't start a company, they start a movement.” -- Christina Dunbar

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.