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Even when they really push your buttons.
By Brittney Lindstrom — Written on Oct 01, 2018
You probably have a few toxic friendships and relationships in your life with men and women who really push your buttons.
Instead of blowing up in the heat of the moment because you let a toxic friend or tactless sibling get to you, take the high road and be prepared for your next encounter by learning how to navigate the toxic relationships in your life with grace and dignity.
This will help you keep your cool and not fly off the handle the next time a someone's toxic behavior gets under your skin ... which always seems to happen at the most inopportune moments, like when you're already angry or upset about something.
And while it's all to easy to react emotionally when someone pushes your buttons, how you deal with these types of toxic relationships in your life matters — you can’t just go off on someone at work, school, or another public or professional place (as tempting as the idea may be).
So instead of letting their bad behavior get the best of you the next interacting with this toxic person is unavoidable, be prepared by knowing how to respond — gracefully — to their anger-inducing antics.
Here are 12 life-saving ways to navigate toxic friendships and other toxic relationships when someone's really pushing your buttons.
1. Be aware of what your buttons are and consistently be mindful of them. Let those who are close to you know what pushes your buttons, too, so they can be mindful and aware also.
2. When you start feeling triggered by a conversation with a toxic friend, steer the discussion in a different direction and on to something less sensitive or personal.
3. If something is starting to truly upset you and it is no longer just a mere annoyance, leave the room and find a place to regain control and collect your thoughts. It's okay to take a personal time-out to avoid reacting emotionally in the moment.
4. Understand that you can’t control other people’s behavior, but you can control is your behavior and reactions to theirs.
5. Constantly remind yourself that what other people do or say is not a reflection on you — this is a toxic relationship.
6. Try to remember that so many problems and issues arise from miscommunication and misunderstandings.
7. In the heat of the moment, take several slow and deep breaths to regain your balance, both physically and mentally.
8. When you are calm and focused, analyze why certain behaviors or actions bothered you and pushed your buttons.
9. Create and maintain boundaries in toxic friendships and other toxic relationships.
10. Keep conversations with toxic people brief and minimal.
11. Realize that the toxic relationships in your life need more awareness for how you deal with them.
12. Remind yourself daily that you may have good or bad experiences throughout the day with toxic friends and acquaintances. Prepare yourself for any potential obstacles by giving yourself a little pep talk before you expect to encounter someone who typically pushes your buttons.
Brittney Lindstrom is a Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Rehabilitation Counselor.