The 3 Main Things Men Want In A Relationship


What men really want.

Today I’m going to answer one of the most popular questions I get on the emails here, what men want in a relationship. As I’ve said on countless occasions, men are simple creatures and thus, my answer today will be very simple. When I’ve mentioned this on the emails, many women were shocked by the simplicity of the answer…

As a woman you may not agree with these because this is NOT what YOU want in a relationship, but remember, you are a woman and thus have different desires and expectations. When it comes to MEN these are the MAIN things they look for when it comes to starting a relationship.

I agree that there may be men out there that have additional expectations when looking for a partner but those guys are in the low minority and that’s exactly why we won’t be discussing those other “desires” as they do not fit in with the GENERAL mindset of men and their motivations.

1. SEX

I’m sure this doesn’t come as a big shock but it may be shocking to realize that it’s the MOST important thing a guy wants from a woman. No, this is not my PERSONAL opinion either; it really is the driving factor for all men. Quite frankly we can call this the reason why MOST men get up in the morning, in hopes that they’ll wake up the next day with someone in their bed.

You might argue that food is more important to some men but if that were the case, and men had to choose between food and sex, starvation would probably be the number 1 reason why the male population is quickly dropping.

The basic gist of it is that, without constant sex most men are unable to function. If constant sex is missing from their lives, then they will do anything to make it happen. Don’t think of sex as kinky desire many men have, it all boils down to a WOMAN that is willing to get naked with a man on a regular basis. If you’re that woman and you’re sleeping with us regularly, then the man you’re sleeping with will CONSIDER (not immediately want) you for a relationship.

2. Comfort

Comfort is another incredibly important thing to us men, and I can confidently say that comfort is the main reason why most men STAY in relationships.

Many men want and stay with women that provide them with a safe haven, a comfortable place, a warm atmosphere in which we can escape the noise and stress from the outside world. This is not a physical environment, but more an emotional one.

The fact that a guy can come home from work, sit down on his couch with his lovely woman next to him is something that all men dream about. We want you to be part of the relaxed atmosphere that takes our minds away from everything else in his life.

We love and appreciate your supportive attitude and soothing words. We relish in your warmth and understanding. To put this more simply, your very presence makes us feel better.

On the flip side, if you nag, criticize, treat us with antipathy (like the “outside” world) we’re likely to stay in a relationship and would rather do anything to get out.

3. Companionship

Finally, companionship, this is probably the reason why men eventually decide to marry a woman. As the word companionship very eloquently describes this need, we are looking for a person that is fun to be around; a person that shares our own interests; a person that we can talk to about our dreams, goals; a person that gets our sense of humor; a person that will stick by us no matter what.

Once we find such a person, it’s only natural that we will try to do absolutely everything in our power to spend the most amount of time together. Oh compatibility…and its powerful drive to stick people together.

There you have it ladies, the simple, shocking but yet hard truth about what men want from a relationship. You might think that he is surely searching for something more than that, maybe a partner, a soul mate, life mate, coffee mate, roommate or whatever else.

You may be thinking that because that’s what you’d want from a man, but as I’ve mentioned in the beginning, that’s because women and men have very different needs and desires when it comes to a relationship.

Although sometimes we may have other “requests”, the bottom line is that they all boil down to these BIG 3. 

This is the sort of stuff I discuss on my blog and in the free eBook I give out. If you want to increase your love life’s success, visit – a place where the conventional “dating mindset” is thrown out the window in favor of more direct and fruitful methods of meeting, attracting and keeping a quality man in your life.

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.