What's The Secret To Winning The World Cup? Sex!


This just in: dry spells aren't helping soccer teams score on the field, either.

Well, it seems like our previous World Cup sex article was a bit premature. A new study is shutting down the debate on whether sex has an effect on a team's chances to win it all for their country.

In case you were out of loop, certain countries put restrictions on their players having sex throughout the tournament. The teams' policies range all over the place.

Teams Practicing Abstinence:
Bosnia, Russia, Chile, and Mexico are all under dry spells. These teams have been practicing abstinence for the World Cup and saving the scoring for the field.

Teams In A Gray Area:
Spain and Germany allow their players to have sex, unless it's a night before a match.
Costa Rica players are not allowed to have sex until the second round in order to give the players more incentive to win.
Brazil will allow its players to have sex, but it can't be anything too freaky that will risk injuries.
France gives their players free reign, but is against all-nighters.
Nigeria allows only married players to get it on with their wives.

Teams Who Can Get It On:
Every other team that wasn't listed is allowing their players to have sex any way they like it

The Moscow Times conducted a study to settle the matter on whether these conditions are better for a soccer team's chances at winning. The study found that all teams abstaining from sex failed to make it pass Round of 16 in the knockout stage of the event.

Even more interesting, the less strict countries like France, Costa Rica, Brazil, and the Netherlands made it further than the abstinent ones by making it to the quarterfinals.

There has yet to be a scientific reason for this. Perhaps it is a weird coincidence, but I think most of can agree that a good time in bed can relieve stress, which gets us in the zone for work.