How To Have The Ultimate Gay New Jersey Wedding

Love: How To Have The Ultimate Gay New Jersey Wedding

As of Monday, New Jersey became the 14th state in the nation to recognize same-sex nuptials.

History has officially been made in New Jersey, y'all. The land of the shore and home of The Boss has finally come round and granted same-sex couples the right to marry publicly — and proudly — in their home state.

But what's a New Jersey wedding without the stars and popular venues that put their state on the map? We did all the planning for you so you can focus on  saying yes to the dress or tux.

The Venue:
The Garden State is filled with everything from rural to seaside locations — but we're going to skip the beach for this one and bring you to the real star of Real Housewives Of New Jersey: The Brownstone Sure Cape May is lovely, but who needs a gorgeous beach when you could potentially hug Caroline Manzo?


The Cake:
You're going to want something over-the-top, amirite? We recommend the famous Carlo's Bakery in Hoboken — this way you can have the masterpiece you've always dreamed of and maybe even a cameo on Cake Boss Thanks, Buddy!


The DJ:
OK, maybe Pauly D isn't the best DJ in the world, but he's a new dad, you guys We have a feeling his new role translates into less pulsing beats and more sweet, sensitive tunes. And if not, hopefully your grandma likes to untz untz on the dancefloor.


The Hair:
While we can't make any guarantees about how your hair will turn out, visiting Gatsby Salon from Jerseylicious will ensure one thing: lots of drama Witnessing the chaos might be worth all the extra hairspray.


The Guest List:
The only thing that really matters? Yes

From Nicholson and Meryl Streep to Ice-T, we've got the celebrity guest list every Seaside lady and gent should invite for to his (or her) fist-pumping nuptials

The Best Dancer: Jack Nicholson
If you need a creepy-but-adorable aging man to entice all those young drunks to make their way to the dance floor, Uncle Jack is the one to do it. And if you can get him to agree to wear his Joker outfit, make sure you give the man a rightful solo.


The Best Officiant: Ice-T
If you want to cruise through the ceremony and skip all of the religious fluff (hey, no shame if you do or you don't believe in it), but can you imagine how fun being married at the hands of Ice-T would be? Hell, he might even use Spartacus as a ring bearer!
The Best Toast: Kevin Spacey
but on one condition: He gives his entire toast as his character, Frank Underwood, in House of Cards. Not only will their be words of encouragement, but I'd rather have power-hungry Frank Underwood's manipulative, twisted and vengeful marital words of wisdom instead over his creepy American Beauty character.


The Worst Bridesmaid: Meryl Streep
Think about it like this: how could any bride (or groom) ever outshine Meryl? Two words: You can't And here's two more: You won't. There's no way in Asbury Park you'd ever be able to simultaneously possess enough sass, class and sheer star power to ever outdo Meryl. Sorry.


Wedding Guest With the Best Hair: Jon Bon Jovi
All jokes aside, at the height of his pop culture fame with Bon Jovi, there's no denying the man's got a hell of a head of hair And there's always the chance that he'll take the stage at the end of the night for a rousing rendition of "Living on a Prayer."


The Wedding Guest Most Likely to Get Laid: Do I even need to say it?
I'm just hoping that I'll get an invitation to this NJ wedding for a chance to be taken home by a phantom Frank Sinatra Talk about a true American Dreamboat, ladies and lads, because even if the newlyweds are too tired to get it on, there's no doubt that Frank will be ready to go.