Choose A Summer of Love


It may not be 1969 (I believe that was the summer of love) but it's time for love.

Seek and you shall find and I did find! After hearing about matchmakers for years I decided to seek one who had the right approach for me. Instead of working with a professional Cupid who would subject me to dating coaching classes and makeovers before introducing me to potential dates, I looked for the matchmaker who approached finding matches like a recruiter. The kind of matchmaker who would spot a man at Starbucks and walk up to him and have no problem saying that if he's single, she has someone in mind for him. This is what I call the scouting style of matchmaking and I found it in Anni Powers of The Real Matchmaker.

After 18 months of online dating, mixers, and being a social butterfly, I'm tired of the non-committed men when it comes to the dating world who are often found on OKCupid or even eHarmony. While I've known couples who met on or, it's not uncommon for those lovebirds to each have spent a considerable time weeding through the bad matches to find the one. I've been patient enough and decided to do something different which was hire Anni.

Last summer I met a guy named Josh who claimed he worked as a corporate fraud investigator for Kroll. He also claimed he had a Masters degree in Crimminal Justice from San Jose State. Josh claimed that he worked with financial institutions looking for evidence of emplloyee theft from bank accounts. Complete lie. Thanks to a friend who actually went to San Jose State and got a Masters in Crimminal Justice (plus is very active in alumni events) it turned out that Josh was loss prevention/security guard at Abercrombie & Fitch near Stockton, California. Far cry from the image he presented of himself as a person who interrogated people for a living. If I ever run into him again, I will bet money that I'm the better interrogator than he could ever dream to be. For the record all my friend had to go was look through her yearbooks to see if Josh was included in the pictures. She was the same age as he and after pouring over a decade worth of yearbooks there was no one mention of him.

Anni has considerable experience in the world of professional matchmaking and she includes makeovers in her services. Most important though is that I'm giving Anni the task of pre-qualifying and background checking the matches she feels would be ones to introduce to me. While I don't expect her to be a miracle worker I do know she will do her best to determine how ready a man is to be in a committed relationship. Quite frankly, I'm done with the damaged, baggage saddled, game playing guys. Plus, I don't have the time to do the pre-qualifying myself.

When it comes to love I've drawn a line in the sand. I'm ready now and only want to meet people who are on the same page as I. In addition to Debi Bernt's Engaged In A Year Coaching Program, immersing myself in Imago workshops for singles, stretching my social skills and social group through various hobbies, having BodyTalk sessions with Heather Strang, attending Matthew Hussey's Get the Guy workshops, learning Tantra with Devi Ward, and having a life coach in Elisabeth Manning to complement my weekly therapy sessions (I have to be shrink wraped as part of my graduate program) it's time to step up my game.  Why all this self-growth work? Because I was determined to break my bad habits in dating. No way did I want to become a relationship repeater. So now, instead of meeting three new people a week, I'm going to meet three new people a day, because one never knows where it may lead.

Never waste time, especially when it comes to love. If you're ready then only have your heart open to someone who is too. Everyone else get out of the way. Laser focus is what love and shooting an arrow to hit your target successfully is what it's all about!

P.S. In regards to pre-qualifying, let's just say it goes both ways, I told Anni that I'd show her my most recent LiveScan results if she wanted along with my government-issued ID. I'm all about transparency when it comes to dating.