Obamacare Means We'll Get The Sexual Health Treatment We Deserve


The Supreme Court ruled the Obamacare law constitutional today by a five-to-four margin.

While everyone's favorite killjoy Mitt Romney has vowed to toss out Obamacare if he's elected president (in your dreams, Romney), today, in a move that proved that America is finally taking a step in the right direction, the Supreme Court ruled in favor of the plan. Let's raise a glass.

This a huge deal, considering we are the wealthiest country in the world, yet we still charge top dollar for healthcare — whereas our European buddies have a more sane, realistic and less financially burdensome way of dealing with it. By August, roughly 13 million Americans will be receiving rebates from their insurance companies, who were too busy overcharging and doling out bonuses to CEOs instead of investing in the healthcare of the people.

Obamacare will also make sure that no American is denied treatment for pre-existing conditions, or for any reason at all. What this also means is that funding will be put into healthcare establishments including Planned Parenthood, which is an essential part of keeping both men and women educated about sex, and free of STDs and unwanted pregnancies.

Before you conservative folk have a freak-out with your inaccurate statistics regarding Planned Parenthood, I would like to point out that a mere 3 percent of their services are abortions. The remaining 97 percent include STD prevention and treatment, cancer screening and prevention, contraception, pregnancy tests and, above all, education. With funding coming to Planned Parenthood from Obamacare, not only will we hopefully see a decrease in STDs and unplanned pregnancies, but an overall increase in the health of sexually active people.

The Planned Parenthood aspects aside, Obamacare is a step forward in offering healthcare that should not just be a privilege for those who can afford insurance, but a basic and fundamental right. So let the Republicans fight and talk smack about it until they're blue in the face. Those of us who believe in the health of our country are ecstatic, and we'll revel in it as long as we can. 

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