From the sappy & poetic to the raunchy & hilarious—here are our top 25 favorite submissions to date.
By Melissa Noble — Written on May 10, 2011
If you count sweaty sheets, messy hair and broken lamps as everyday bedroom casualties, than boy do we have the challenge for you. Take a minute to rifle through your erotic mental files and shoot us your best 10-word (or less) description of amazing sex. If you can turn a killer phrase and we like yours best, you could win a fantastic trip to New York City plus $1000. Just make sure to submit your official entries here: CONTEST CLOSED! Describe Amazing Sex & Win A Trip To NYC + $1000!
If you want an idea of what's raised our eyebrows in the past few weeks, check out our top 25 submission (out of nearly 300) picks, which range from sappy and poetic to raunchy and hilarious.
The Hilarious:
- [sax solo from Careless Whisper] — JoeScratchless
- She takes a morning after pill and cooks me breakfast — disco dan
- I love you, this is awesome, please don't get pregnant — Tom
- I can't believe it's illegal to pay for this — two to tango
- A dab of Zestra will make me moleste ya! — Quyennie
- Oh God, Oh God, and this coming from an atheist — eking61
- I'll be honest, this is way better with another person —Tom
- Neighbor, knocking, "Do I have to call the cops?"— sarah
- Neighbors come over to complain, end up joining in — JoeScratchless
- Oh, shit! We broke the bed... again — longshot1986
The NSFW:
- Making me squirt and quiver, gives me butterflies —charlatte
- Penetration so deep that even my nipples tremble with emotion — Jiris12
- Dirty with desire he bathed my body with his tongue — mishatemplarsinclair
- Effortless penetration, slick steady strokes ending in intense orgasmic release — Quyennie
- Slick wet throbbing bouncing jerking rhythmic hot aching wonderful — bluepeach1
- The sweat ran down her breast and her nipple shined — howiefd
- A mind-numbing, body-tingling, genital-swelling, addictive pastime — kimberlykirkpatrick
The Poignant:
- Deep cuts on my back. Deeper cuts on my soul — sbtrfg127
- She melted my soul like a hot knife in butter — bishopave
- Even the timid feel like pornstars, surrendering to Madame Nature —yxm
- Back floating in sun dappled pond with skilled lover attending — CatherineBehan
- Waking in his shirt damp with passion smelling fresh coffee — CatherineBehan
- Entwined, entranced, enters, entering, moving, melodious motion, making...sense - ation — mrserinewilson
- Rippling waves, every nerve tingles, breathless, woosh! — Country Rose