Community Spotlight: Do Women Prefer Bad Boys Over Nice Guys?

Bad Boy Driving Car

Why some women can't stand nice guys, and others prefer them. Our community weighs in.

Recently, Lucia, Dating Expert on the YourTango Experts Blog, stirred up a heated discussion in her post, "12 Reasons Women Can't Stand Nice Guys." Her premise was that women say they prefer nice guys but usually end up dating bad boys because bad boys are more "real" than nice guys, more attractive, more respectable and more charming, to name a few reasons. YourTango user kookyguy agrees, to an extent.

While women do like bad boys, what makes it odd is that a lot of those bad boys are fake. More nice guys are keeping it real than bad boys. If someone has to act like a bad boy, then they are fake, just like if someone has to act like a nice guy, they are fake. Far more guys act like bad boys just to try and get laid. Saying nice guys are too nice sounds odd. Sure, some probably are, but how can anyone think all nice guys are too nice? It would be nice if more women like a guy for who they are instead of the poser bad boys they seem to go for so often.

YourTango user tommiphillips, however, doesn't agree with the author's generalizations.

When are people going to realize that we are all individuals and we will always want something different because we are different from each other? There is the quintessential answer to the question of "What do women want?" Answer — We all want different things. Plain and simple. And men are the same. They want different things too, because they are not all the same either.

So, are nice guys really that bad? Or is it unfair to paint all men and women with such broad strokes? Join the conversation: 12 Reasons Women Can't Stand Nice Guys.

On the Ask YourTango forum, user Aaron V4in solicits advice about his wife's lack of interest in sex.

I have been married for 7 years and everything is good but our sex life, My wife is very busy and runs her own business and with everything going on at home it's taken the back burner for sure. We have no kids but lots of animals. I'm thinking it may be me. To be honest, I know I have a small penis and in the past I could tell she gets kind of frustrated with the issue. She has joked a few times about how small I am to me, and it does not bother me at all. Should I be up front and ask her if this is why?

Do you have any advice for Aaron? Do you think he should confront his wife about his concerns? Join the conversation: Wife Is Too Busy for Sex...