Battle of the Age(s)


What does a girl want?

So one topic that's been popping up a lot lately between my friends and I, and also just girls of my age is: 'What do we want?'

It's been instilled in us to always make these great and vast decisions and then expected to deliver promising results. Deciding on a college, a major, friendship circle, sorority, job, career, the list goes on and on. But how are we ever to be sure we even know what we really want?

I mean I have a hard enough time picking out what I'm going to wear in the morning, let alone choose a direct career path in this unstable and unforgiving economy - not to mention picking out a boyfriend with ample enough qualities that could eventually lead to marriage and babies? What ever happened to dating, or me time? What's with all the pressure?

A friend of mine just went through a break-up and suddenly became the most enlightened person I know. It's like it takes a total extreme to make you into the sensible person you always thought you were. The gates of heaven opened and that bright light shined down - finally some clarity.

Sometimes in life there comes a time where you have to be selfish. I mean, we can all be selfish at times, sure, but when it comes to attempting to figure out your own life, it's impossible to gain any perspective or order when you have other people to worry about as well. Life doesn't get much easier the older you get, so take the time now to enjoy it while you can. I'm always thinking 10 steps ahead and that's how you miss all the small stuff in between.

My friend, who we'll call 'Casey' dated this guy, who we'll call 'Spencer' for about a year. All was good and fine throughout the easy, breezy 'honeymoon' stage - until one day when he decided to drop a bombshell on 'Casey.' Naturally shocked, appalled and confused, we sat around for hours and days trying to figure out what went wrong. You know what we finally came up with...NOTHING! You want to know why? Because 'Casey' couldn't see through the red tape in her relationship, like most of us are unfortunately guilty of. You're blinded by the person you wish they were and want to believe the best in everyone, give each person the rightful chance and benefit of the doubt. But truthfully girls, sometimes they just don't deserve it. Turns out 'Spencer' was harsh, overly critical, manipulative and oh, did I mention, flat out pathological liar? Yeah. So after many tears and an almost very regretful decision of taking 'Spencer' back - the relationship had finally run its course and it was over.

The amount of knowledge 'Casey' became filled with was overwhelming in the best way possible. Lucky for me, she shared her newfound wisdom with me, and now, I can share with you. The infamous saying, "you're only young once," quite frankly, gets lost in the shuffle of the hustle and bustle of our crazy busy lifestyles. Like me, thinking about your next move before you've even given yourself a chance to breathe and settle into your current standings, does not allow you to abide by that rule.

How are you supposed to know what you want if you don't try out different possibilities? Date different people, figure out what you like and what you don't like and go from there. Allow yourself the chance to see what's out there and what works for you and what is best for you.

And most importantly - never underestimate the power of your girlfriends.