5 Illusions That Can Ruin Your Sex Life

Love, Sex

Dr. Marianne Brandon dishes on the illusions and facts that could make or break your sex life

1. Illusion: Out of lust means out of love.

Fact: You can love someone in a romantic way even if lust wanes.

Humans have a drive to feel lust, and we also have a drive to feel companionate love. Although these feeling states can co-occur at the beginning of a romantic relationship, they are ultimately separate sensations. That means you can feel lust without love, or as a relationship ages, you can feel love without lust. If you are like most people, you want to feel both at the same time. This means that you have to consciously create lusty passionate experiences if that natural passion starts to wane.

What to do? Your best bet is to keep doing new things sexually – newness brings back the sensations of passion. So bring your creative, adventurous side into the bedroom! Try new positions, make love in new places, and wear different things to bed. Stretch your sexual boundaries on occasion so that you don’t get stuck in bedroom ruts. And don’t be stingy – the more you give, the more you’ll get back for yourself in return.

2. Illusion: What you put in your grocery cart does not impact your sex life.

Fact: A healthy body is an important part of a satisfying sex life.

Eating healthy requires a conscious effort today. We are bombarded with “food” options that are filled with unhealthy fats, carbs, toxins, and empty calories. It is very possible that most of the stuff you put in your grocery cart really wouldn’t quality as food, in the purest sense of the word. And this can have numerous negative effects on your sexual health. For example, obesity correlates with low libido and erectile dysfunction, not to mention poor body image and decreased athletic capacity. Nutritional deficiencies cause low energy and a diminished ability for the body to respond sexually.

What to do? When you are making your food selections, remember that what is unhelpful for your body is also unhelpful for your sex life – and vice-versa. So look at those fruits and veggies in a new, exciting light! Juicy, succulent, ripe, foods support a juicy, succulent, ripe sex life!

Next: If sexual chemistry wanes...

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