What My First Time Taught Me About Sex

smiling girl thinking in bed

What did you learn the first time you had sex?

And so, heeding the sage advice running through my head, I let it all go. If only for a brief moment in time, I eased up. I didn't obsess or fixate or over-think. I didn't analyze or dissect or agonize. I took in the moment's perfect imperfection and let it be. I think I even laughed. 5 Funny Sex Injuries

For once in my life, I enjoyed the, ahem, ride, and tuned out everything that didn't matter: the state of his bedroom (no luxury suite), the less-than-ideal soundtrack and that ridiculous hat, which he actually stopped, mid-act, to put back on. For a moment, I ignored all that was inconsequential. For a moment, I relaxed. And that feeling, in and of itself, was perfect.

I will always be the perfectionist, that girl who gets overly caught up in the details. And frankly, my first time did not sync up with the choreographed deflowering on Ritz Carlton 1000-thread-count sheets I'd mapped out in my head years earlier. However, I was fortunate to have had a first time that dramatically shaped my outlook on sex in a positive way.

There are times when striving for perfection matters, and obsessing over the minutiae is appropriate, but sex isn't one of them. Sex is about momentarily relaxing and savoring the experience, not about going insane (in the membrane).

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission from the author.