Man Calls Cops When Paid Woman Fails To Perform

Buzz, Love

A New Hampshire man gets ripped off AND arrested after paying for sex.

All guys have been there before. You pay for a nice dinner, a trip to the cinema and perhaps a horse-drawn carriage through the park (or some burgers, a couple of forties and a little Dance Dance Revolution) and, at the end of the night, you go in for a hug / kiss and possibly something x'tra. And then, all you get is a hug with the same amount of warmth and eroticism as the handshake after a bad job interview. If the guy doesn't really dig the gal, he thinks, at least for one cheap, shameful moment, "Wow, I dropped $150 and I only got an MFing hug. What about a hand shandy? How much would a hooker have cost?" In that awful, mercenary instant, dude rips a little mental calculus and feels ripped off. Read: Actually, Maybe You Can Buy Love

But this is nothing compared to the indignation we feel when we really are paying for sex, and still don't get it. A New Hampshire man, per Yahoo, was so irked about not getting the sex he paid for that he called Johnny Law and filed a complaint. When the cops arrived, he informed them that he'd come to an agreement with a woman and a third party in which he would receive various sexual favors for a payment of $150. He dutifully paid the money and, in return, received no sex acts. Read: My Boyfriend Cheated On Me With Hookers

As you can imagine, the police, while probably sympathetic to the man's plight, had to arrest both the man and woman on charges of solicitation and prostitution, respectively. Seeing as New Hampshire's motto is "Live Free Or Die," it's a little surprising that ho-ing was the problem rather than breach-of-contract. They are both due in court. Read: Korean Court Rules Against Going Dutch

The whole situation reminds me of a fantastic moment from the Dana Carvey Show (Steve Carell and Stephen Colbert started here). Please check out the vid: