Flirting Mistakes We All Make

Love, Self

Can't get a date? Retire your bad flirting technique.

Speaking of insults ...

The horrifying pick-up culture that brought us mooks like Mystery has spawned a generation of nitwits who believe "negging" is the fast track into a person's pants. Unfortunately, it's not just men who utilize this method. "I still never understand why people think being insulting is an adorable thing to do," Lipez laments. "I guess they think they're being cute and coy." The Frisky: How To Use Your Feminine Wiles

I can't believe a behavior that sixth-graders employ to express their ardor is still in rotation. If you can't say something nice ...

Don't get ahead of yourself.

Seattle writer Diane Mapes was on a crowded bus one day when she spotted your prototypical tall dark and handsome dude giving her the sly, one-eyebrow-raised look o' lust. "I lean over and start talking to him," she laughs. "I'm making what I think is witty banter and he's smiling and laughing." Diane was excited—who meets anyone on a bus?  So she leaned in and asked him an appropriately flirty question—just like my friend Michelle would have recommended! The Frisky: I Dated The Real Don Draper

This didn't go as smoothly for her as it did for my pal. "He looked up at me with those big brown eyes and answered, 'No hablo inglés.'"

Wit works best on those who actually understand your jokes, so maybe start off slow with "hello." Or "hola." The Frisky: Racism And Dating

It's not brain surgery.

What it comes down to is that if you're a relatively attractive woman, it's really hard to flirt badly. I mean, what is flirting but making another person feel good about himself? How hard is that to do effectively? As long as you don't tell the guy he looks like Vern Troyer, insult his intelligence (or his ass), and can manage to eke out a dopey question in a language he understands, you're doing OK. If you can work in a compliment, a smile, and a flash of cleavage, you're golden. The Frisky: Lies Women Tell Themselves

Written by Judy McGuire for The Frisky

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