Morning News Feed Monday December 15


Robot sex, dog visitation rights, teens aren't dating & acid attacks.

Good morning, and welcome to December 15, 2008. And here is today’s news:

Into porn, in a bad way? You could be in luck. The channel that killed the radio star (as an accomplice), birthed reality TV (a true story about what happens when strangers stop being nice and start being real) and brought us that creep time-lapsed show about that drunk dude wants to climb inside the brain of a porn addict, walk around a bit and see what makes him tick (among other things). And, according to Boinkology, they need a cast.

It's still up in the air whether or not porn is cheating. One thing that is cheating is using a hooker. But what if she's a robot? Asylum asks the a question that people have been noodling since the Buck Rogers days, does sex with a robot hooker break the marriage covenant?

Maybe sex with a robot outside of marriage is adultery. And maybe porn is a big problem. But what about cheating in your dreams? Daily Bedpost has a great running feature in which they analyze sex dreams. This time around her exes watch she and her boss rut on her husband's childhood bed.

Maybe pastor Jim Bolin could do with a touch of the dream analysis. According to, the pastor of a church in Powder Springs, Georgia is stepping down because of "inappropriate sexual behavior." He deigns to tell anyone what the problem is, which just serves to pique interest. Let's hope it's not mopery.

Another big-time church official is out of a job because of an interpersonal issue. Top Evangelical pastor, Reverend Richard Cizik, came out in favor of gay civil unions and has an open mind about gay marriage. According to the El Paso Times, this stance runs counter to the stance of the National Association of Evangelicals in such a way that he had to go. He'll be missed.

You know what else will be missed? Dogs. The new battleground, per the Daily Telegraph, in divorce is pet visitation rights. "You can keep the house and the kids, you malevolent jerk, but Bruiser is coming with me and I will not hear another word about it."

While adults are quibbling about pets, guess what the kids aren't doing? Dating. As we've all long known (and Tom Wolfe suspected), teens and youngsters aren't going on dates anymore. They are fooling around or what in they call in their parlance "hooking up." Shocking. The New York Times intrepidly went to the source (the kids!) and even put together a handy dandy line graph.
The kids are reaping the benefits of a party now - pay later lifestyle while older adults are harvesting the consequences of scientific speculation. Whaa? We were trying to eloquently segue into some facts about the latest study about the lingering effects of Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) and dropped the ball. According to the Washington Post, the latest test on HRT proved that it increases the chance for breast cancer. Silver lining: this breast cancer seems to be far less terminal than other varieties.

They say that men actually get better looking as they age. Some UK men must think that sounds fishy (and chippy) because according to the Daily Mail they're refusing to let nature run it's course. They're attempting to beat back the slow, steady march of time by getting jabs (injections, on the left side of the pond) of collagen, Botox and other age-defying weirdness.

Irrespective of how the men look, women in the UK appear to have it much better than those living in other parts of the world. Per Reuters, a young English doctor of Bangladeshi decent was held captive by her family on her return to Bangladesh. They insisted she marry some guy but she was not up for the forced marriage. Now she’s heading back to London, land of men getting cosmetic procedures so that you want to marry them.

And Jezebel lets us know that justice is becoming blind (in a good way) in some parts of the eastern world. A woman in Iran was blinded with acid by a spurned suitor and now said suitor has to suffer the same fate. Somewhere Hammurabi is giving us a big thumbs up but Gandhi is chiding him with the old chestnut "an eye for an eye makes the world blind." He won't be pouring sulfuric acid in another woman's eyes, that's for sure. We wonder if this will just raise the stakes in the Persian courtship maiming game.