Mayer To Propose? Jake Ready For Kids?

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New families for Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon?

Dammit. It has been a sorry week for celebrity gossip. Are all the celebrities summering in some country like Svenborgia that only rich people know about? Are the paps all back in San Quentin? What gives? OK the not news news, MonstersAndCritics is reporting that John Mayer may possibly explore the idea of proposing to Jennifer Aniston sometime in the '08.

M&C goes on to say that we shouldn't be surprised if Jen (nifer) is wearing an engagement ring while doing the press tour for her fall film Management (out September 19th). You know what? We retain our right to be surprised. In this 'nothing would surprise me' world of celebrity hijinks, we want to be pleasantly shocked from time to time. Like when we heard that Nicole Richie was giving some of her shower gifts to abused women. That was mighty decent of her. Shock us with something good. Like if Management (also with Steve Zahn and Woody Harrelson) turned out to be a new millennium successor to Office Space. That would be great. We have high hopes that Jennifer Aniston can be really successful and happy without getting into a new TV show playing a Rachel Green clone. Let's not make it a new album of Dave Matthews' John Mayer's greatest hits played on sitar, either. Shock us good, Amadeus.

While we're discussing non-news, Digital Spy reports that Jake Gyllenhaal (most recently in Rendition with Reese Witherspoon) may be ready for children. Ahh. The children that Reese Witherspoon had with Ryan Phillippe or new yet-to-be-conceived children? We don't know anything about these 2 and we're glad if they're ready for more kids but we had a feeling after hearing about their cohabitation that he was in over his head. It happens to the best of us. The good news is that he and Brad Pitt, even with modern medicine, can count on not having to live much past 120-140 years old. That's not so long. Wait, who is that good news for?