Jessica Alba Has A Baby

Jessica Alba Has A Baby

Jessica Warren and Cash Warren have a baby named Honor.

How about that? It wasn't gas. According to everyone, but The Superficial in particular, Jessica Alba had Cash Warren's baby. It was a girl baby and the gang decided to call her Honor Marie Warren. Good deal. The Superficial hopes that the baby is more a tiny clone of Jessica than an amalgam of the parents (for the sake of posterity, we assume). We have other concerns.

Not to go all Asswipe Johnson (it's pronounced ass-we-pay) on you, but is 'Honor' really an acceptable name for a girl? We appreciate naming people after concepts rather the old Judeo-Christian standards but certain names are a little dicey such as Chastity, Destiny, Charity, and other stripper-y names. And Honor just may be one of them. And you know that old children's tale, from the sea, "She offered her honor, he honored her offer and all night long it was on 'er and off 'er." Yeah, that's what she's dealing with her whole life. Especially if she has the Alba early bloomer genes. Way to really think it out guys. Maybe you can just call her Marie. Congratulations on the baby, way to ruin her life.