Why tap that ass when you can kick it instead?
I've heard of wedding parties getting arrested, but this story out of Pittsburgh takes the cake. Once the reception ended, newlyweds Dr. and Mrs. Wielechowski checked in to The Holiday Inn and proceeded to beat the living daylights out of each other. When two guests tried to break up the argument the newlyweds joined forces to attack them causing about $1000 worth of damage to the hotel in the process. The good samaritans were rewarded with cuts, bruises, a tooth knocked out and a possibly broken thumb. (Score! The groom's job as a dentist should come in handy settling this lawsuit.)
The couple were both charged with simple assault, criminal mischief and disorderly conduct. Mrs. Wielechowski was also charged with public drunkenness. They spent the night in separate cells at the county jail before being released on their own recognizance in the morning.
No word on what started the fight or whether the couple plans to stay together or seek an annulment. Mrs. Wielechowski, you are not be the first bride to get arrested on her wedding night, but I'm thinking an annulment is the way to go. If you find yourself in doubt, remember that your husband was sober when he "used a karate-style kick with his leg" to drop you to the floor. Just something to think about.