Love Bytes: three must-click sex, dating and relationship links. People on bikes with no clothes crash a wedding. Bridal party wonders about chafing. [Buzzfeed] A Pakistani gang-rape victim who shunned custom and rose to global fame by speaking out about her case has defied another local taboo. She just got married. [Huffington Post] Maybe Octomom isn't actually the most terrifying and irresponsible procreator on the planet after all. [Asylem] While everyone is in a twist over the reproductive havoc Nadya "Octomom" Suleman has wrought, it is only fair to point out that men have been burdening society with carelessly large broods since the beginning of time. Case in point: Travis Henry, the 30-year-old former NFL running back fathered at least nine children with nine different women, but can no longer pay child support, in part because he is currently facing 10-to-life on cocaine-distribution charges.
Paris Hilton's former BFF is really making it happen on the family front. Nicole Richie, formerly The Simple Life's sidekick/ comic relief, has already made the leap to mommyhood. She liked it so much that she has another one on the way. And because it's a fairly sensible thing to do, she and Joel Madden have decided to go ahead and get married before Harlow Winter Kate Madden's little bro or sis is born. Plus, the perfect wedding gown has allegedly been purchased.
It's that time of year again. Every year, Filene's Basement in New York City holds its 'Running of the Brides' sale. Hundreds of eager women line up with friends and family for a chance to storm the bargain department store for their dream dress. With sizes ranging from 2 to 26, there's a good chance a bride-to-be can walk away with a $10,000 Vera Wang for the bargain price of $300. Sounds like a dream opportunity, right? Wrong.
It looks like Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen did exactly what everyone thought they were going to do; get married, man. Evidently, the Brady Bundch was able to keep their nuptials a secret until after the fact, an impressive feat. They also had dogs wearing Dolce & Gabbana. And convinced Bridget Moynihan to come. So, basically good times all around.
Over the weekend, nine of the nerdiest couples in America descended upon the Detroit Science Center for Star Trek: The Exhibition. While there, they proclaimed their love, became formally engaged, and put their names in the hat to win an extravagant Star Trek-themed wedding at the exhibition site this coming June.
Geri Halliwell (a.k.a. Ginger Spice) has come to the conclusion, after only a month, that the Italian guy she's been snogging is the man she's destined to spend the rest of eternity with. Who is this stallion/future step-father to little Bluebell? None other than Italian yacht tycoon Fabrizio Politi. Yeah, we don't know who he is either.
In Spears family news, Jamie Lynn is still getting married to the father of her child. Casey Aldridge and Jamie Lynn Spears have a plan and are going get hitched one of these days. Also, OK! magazine has had enough of the posturing of patriarch Jamie Spears and are ending their spending on the family Spears. And finally, Adessa Eskeridge is suing the Los Angeles airport for that bit of chicanery involving her as the fake Jamie Lynn that one time.
A bride and groom decide they "like big butts" and they "cannot lie" when their first dance song morphs from The Righteous Brothers' "Unchained Melody" into Sir Mixalot's "Baby Got Back." More newlywed couples are ditching the slow ballads in favor of upbeat dance songs that let them "get jiggy with it."
It all began right after our tour of Peter Island in the British Virgin Islands: gray skies, drizzle, word of a "tropical storm warning," and then the news that we'd be in the path of a possible category three hurricane. That meant the various activities included in our honeymoon package—the drive to the top of the island to watch the sunset, the excursion to the Virgin Gorda to go snorkeling, the trip to the private beach—were promptly nixed. "It's fine," said Steve, as I started to whine. "I'd rather be here in the middle of a hurricane than anywhere else. At least we're together." Whatever. Nice words, but they weren't clearing the skies—or getting us a refund. I'm usually a real Girl Scout about stuff like this, able to buck up in the direst of circumstances, but my honeymoon was my turf, and it was being peed on by God.
It's been said that there's no better way to test a relationship than to take it on the road. And in the case of Brendan and Sarah, that road will be about 130 times longer than your average weekend getaway. For thirteen months, they'll be abandoning their home, friends, and careers to take their newly married butts and backpacks around the world. Along the way, they'll travel to twenty countries and send out podcasts documenting their adventures. Will they fight over the mosquito repellent? Get it on in an ancient monument? Only time will tell.
The first year of marriage is notoriously tough, but for couples whose wedding days have gone awry, perhaps this makes the rest easier.In any case, having a disaster wedding day certainly bars the post-wedding blues. Sophie Clarke had been planning her wedding day for three years. Every detail was in place, including the fairy tale touch of a horse-drawn carriage transporting her to the site of the ceremony. Turns out, the reality was not anywhere near the fantasy the British bride had in mind. The horse pulling Clarke's dream carriage bolted on the way to the church, ousting the driver. With the bride and her father still in the open-sided carriage, the horse continued galloping, eventually crashing into a car and losing Clarke and father from the back before settling down to graze in an open pasture. Clarke was taken to a hospital and treated for a concussion—an ending very different from the one she'd orchestrated for her wedding day.
Rumor told gossip told tabloid that Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson may be planning on getting engaged, hitched and pregnant by the end of 2009. This sounds not incredibly likely. Tony Romo is focused on taking the Dallas Cowboys to the Super Bowl right now and probably nods and says "yep" to anything anyone says to him. Papa Joe Simpson has to be pretty psyched to have a favorite grandchild being mentioned.