sex after kids
A new mother questions her breasts' dual functionality, as both sexual objects and food source.
A friend of mine recently described the state of her boobs as "balled-up wet socks." She, like I, had donated her breasts to her daughter, nursing her for the better part of a year.
But this isn't another story about the state of a mother's breasts, the kind that—if you've never had kids—makes you decide right there and then that you will not be nursing any future children because you can't imagine ever describing your own breasts as "saggy," "lifeless," or "uneven." Read: Loving A Post-Baby Body
Instead, this is a story of ownership. From one relationship stage to … Read More
A divorcee rediscovers passion through adult-only parties.
Two years ago while recovering from the demise of a fifteen-year marriage, I responded to an invitation to join a sex party. Knowing I was newly single and in no rush to get involved in another romantic relationship a woman I worked with unexpectedly told me about her unusual hobby and urged me to attend an event.
My marriage failed because of a million complex issues, one of which was my ex-husband's reaction to the changes in my body after I delivered our first child. After weaning my daughter so that I could go back … Read More
Sex after kids explored in a Q&A with author Kimberly Ford.
Kimberly Ford is an author with a Ph.D. in Spanish and French Literature. After writing about sex and parenting for various publications, she realized these were hot topics for a book ("sex sells!"). The result, Hump: True Tales of Sex After Kids, hit bookshelves last month. The mother of three lives with her husband and kids (ages 6, 8 and 10) in Menlo Park, Calif., but she recently stopped by our NYC office to share some stories about erotic dancing, Brazilian waxing, vibrators, communication, Private Time and how these all contribute to having a healthy sex life after … Read More
Getting mind and body back in the mood after giving birth isn't always easy.
It was a standing joke—literally—between Chucho and me. He would pass me in a doorway, our bodies brushing against each other, and suddenly grab me in a crushing embrace, panting, while I smiled sheepishly and waited him out. Then he would pat me on the hindquarters the way you might a favorite horse, and we would go our separate ways.But as two months postpartum turned into four and six and eight, my libido stayed stuck in neutral. We tried, once in awhile, to rev up the engine—we dimmed the lights, bought a new tube of K-Y jelly. But nothing could … Read More
Orthodox Judaism keeps husband and wife apart and passion alive.
Two little drops of reddish brown on my underwear. Here we go again.
Since I had kids my cycle is irregular, which wouldn't be a big deal except that I'm an Orthodox Jew and I can't even pass the salt to my husband—let alone touch, kiss, or have sex with him—for 12 days after my period starts. We never know when we'll have to sleep in separate beds or place a vase with a single rose between us on the dinner table as evidence of our separation.
I was beginning to hate the rigid restrictions on my sex life until … Read More