It was the middle of the night on January 27, 2001. After another big argument with my spouse, I had finally left. Sitting on a friend’s couch I took my wedding rings off. I was done. I just couldn’t take anymore. A month later, I moved into a rental home with my 4-year-old son.
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Preparing for Your Second Marriage is Very Different From the First Time The premier Remarriage Showcase for Encore Brides will be held in metropolitan D.C. on May 14 at River Creek Club in Leesburg, VA. So, what is this event? Who cares? And, why on earth do remarrying brides need an event just for them? Can't they just go to the multitude of bridal shows and expos that are already out there?
They say nights are the hardest to get through, so instead of sleeping in the bed we shared, I'd decided to sleep on the couch. With fresh sheets in hand, I flipped over the end cushion and heard the crinkle of a candy bar wrapper. If he had been in the living room with me, I would have reprimanded him (as I had so many times!) and led him into the kitchen to show him where the garbage can was.
A newlywed couple from Omaha, Nebraska have just moved in with the bride's ex-husband. Yes. Take a moment out to wrap your heads around that one. You get married, divorced, married again and what do you do? Move in with your ex! It takes all types in this world. When Nicole Thompson-Arce married husband No. 2, Mathew Arce (her former mother-in-law was in the wedding, by the way) last July, he lost his job. She had just quit hers, and while he's gainfully employed now, the couple didn't have the funds to provide for her two children from her previous marriage. The two found themselves riddled with debt and unable to pay rent.
While working together with your ex may be difficult, if you have children involved Jann and Sheryl write that you must find a way to work together, regardless of your past history or experiences. Often cooperation requires a complete change of the way you think. "Since I had learned to be angry in my plight," writes Jann, "I decided I could learn not to be angry. Rather than rehearse all of the bad things in my head each morning, I made myself think about the good things—how happy I was to be married to my husband. How happy I was that the kids had accepted me and seem to be adjusting so well. Everyone was healthy. Every time a bad thought come to my mind about Sheryl I pushed it out and replaced it with a more positive thought about my life."
When I proposed to Nicole last October, it was the first time I'd ever gone through the craziness of purchasing a ring, but it wasn't the first time she'd gotten one. It was my first engagement, but her second marriage, making our wedding—like about a third of the wedding in America these days—an "encore wedding," often a second wedding after divorce. Some guys might get jealous— of her first engagement ring, first honeymoon, first house or first-marriage children—but for me, it was almost the opposite. Her first wedding was "her" day, which meant that our wedding was wide open to be "our" day. So what exactly are the rules of an encore wedding? Well, there may not be many, but here's rule number one: it's poor form to compare the current wedding to any previous ones.
