Communication between partners often gets confusing, and there is a very good reason for this. Most of the time, the words we use have far less impact than the energy behind the words. Therefore, what you say is often not what the other person hears. The energy behind a communication is determined by our INTENTION.
Julie is sure that her boyfriend is mad at her. Or that he doesn't think she's as hot as he did when they started dating. Or that he is more attracted to other (thinner) women. Or that he is going to break up with her because he's so angry about something she said or did or possibly because of that other thinner, sexier woman in his life.
Have you ever looked back over your past relationships and said to yourself "What the hell was I thinking?" As you honestly reflect on your past, you will see that the red flags were waving all around you. There was a chance you may not have picked up on them because you were blinded by what you thought was love. But if you get real with yourself, you will see that the red flags were there, waving right in front of your eyes, almost from the very beginning. But you chose to ignore them.
This one's for a guy's eyes, but women, you're more than welcome to be a fly on the wall. It is perhaps a good spot to inhabit while taking a fresh look at the confusing, confronting topic of men and their porn habits!
I see many couples who are struggling with their marriage. When I ask them how long the struggle has been going on the answer is usually several years. When I continue and ask them how they have tried to fix it on their own, 80 percent of the time having a baby, building or buying a new house, and/or having plastic surgery are typical answers. Just looking at these possible fixes they have used makes me stressed out.
Marilee, a client of mine, was commitment phobic. "I'd love to be in a loving relationship," she told me in one of our counseling sessions, "but I'm not willing to give up my freedom. I have a great life. I love my work and my friends. I love to travel and take workshops and classes. I don't want anyone telling me what I can or can't do. I don't want to deal with someone feeling hurt because I want to work rather than be with him. It's just not worth all the hassle."
How To Get the man of your dreams.com has decided to tackle one of the toughest and most controversial subjects of our century, with a solution and explanation through mathematical and economic deductive reasoning.
In 1974, Dr. Virginia Satir presented the concept of mirroring in her groundbreaking book, "Conjoint Family Therapy." In 1975 Dr. Thomas Gordon wrote a best-selling book called "Parent Effectiveness Training." In the book he taught parents to "active listen," which means to reflect back to the speaker the feelings and information they are trying to convey.
We all make mistakes in our relationship from time to time. They can range in severity from forgetting to take out the trash to lying about using the nearly maxed out credit card or from spacing out your anniversary to having an online affair. When you're in a love relationship or marriage, both of you will periodically say or do the “wrong” thing.
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Jealousy can sneak up, catch you unaware and leave you feeling confused and beaten up. Jealousy can also end up destroying your relationship and compromising your health and well-being. This is why jealousy is sometimes referred to as the "green-eyed monster."
