There is no phrase so misinterpreted as "unconditional love." People use it as an excuse to stay in bad relationships. They use it as some ideal they chase when they are not even sure what it means. They use it when they say, "I believe in marriage." or "I believe in loving someone until they can love themselves." or "I'm religious and want to love unconditionally." or "I can't say 'if you do this, I'm out' because that is not unconditional love." None of those things are unconditional love.
In my opinion, this concept is the product of western civilization which assumes that you simply have to find your “true love”, progress your way through to the wedding ceremony; then you are primed to live “Happily Ever After”. The main emphasis is on the choice: you choose “The Right One”, later in the courtship you might be confronted with complications, but undoubtedly everything will quickly turn into roses at the “I do.”
Recommended Books Books on marriage 1. Intimate Partners, by Maggie Scarff 2. Getting the Love You Want, by Harville Hendrix 3. Grown-up Marriage by Judith Viorst 4. The Good Marriage by Judith Wallerstein 5. Families and How to Survive Them by Robin Skynner and John Cleese 6. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman 7. After the Honeymoon by Dan Wile 8. After the Fight by Dan Wile 9. Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson
There’s a lot of talk lately about celebrities getting married too young. The prediction is that these marriages will fail. Are the odds any different as we age? Is age the problem or is divorce the end result of something else- relationship malnutrition? We all need different types of nourishment from a variety of relationships. Yet more and more, I see people looking to their primary partner to provide all of their nourishment. Is this too much to expect from one person?
Apologies are much more than a trite or perfunctory exercise, the kind of half-hearted statements we might have offered as children when we were told to apologize for something we’d done. On the contrary, when coupled with genuine self-reflection, an apology can go a long way in repairing trust and re-establishing connection. Stepping forward when we’ve erred or hurt someone is ennobling and promotes reconciliation.
One of the most common complaints I receive in my relationship counseling work is, "we hardly ever have sex." Since you might be addicted to the anger and complaining surrounding this issue, I want to make sure you do all the "right things" so you get to continue complaining about it! Here are seven tips to ensure you never have to have sex in your relationship again.
We all want to be great lovers and if we don’t get out of the box once in awhile and be adventurous we will become complacent and bored in our relationships. After all, sex is one of the biggest contributors to the divorce statistics and people still seem to ignore the importance of keeping their love alive as a couple. Try adding some of these scenarios to your lovemaking & change up the sexual pattern you may have entered into with your partner.
What is it that compels us to stay in relationships that aren't good for us? There are many reasons, but more often than not, it's a combination of several motivations. The first step towards making your situation better is in understanding why you're making the choices you're making to begin with.
We live in an age where we have grown accustomed to instant gratification. From instant coffee, to instant fast food, to instant messaging, we have become pros at pressing a button or two and having our every wish fulfilled. By the same token, we usually demonstrate loads of impatience with anything, any one or any process that takes longer than five minutes.
Men love long hair…on women, that is. No matter what your husband, lover, boyfriend or significant other may say, all things being equal, your guy would rather see your hair long and luxurious than short and stylish. This may not be exactly what you want to hear (especially if you just coughed up a ton o’ cash on a fashionable, cropped do), but it is nonetheless generally true.
Nearly every relationship harbors some level of financial infidelity. It might be as minor as not telling your partner what you really spent on a gift, or as major as keeping a secret bank account to pay for your gambling addiction. Either way, the path to a healthy money relationship will never be smooth unless you are honest about your behavior and committed to changing your ways.
Many people ask, "should I tell my spouse about my past financial infidelity?" My answer is to get it off your chest, feel free of the past and then move on.Nearly every relationship harbors some level of Financial Infidelity. It doesn't matter what money personality is. It might be as minor as not telling your partner what you really spent on her birthday gift or as major as keeping a secret bank account to pay for your gambling addiction. (Find out where you stand with the Financial Relationship Index) Either way, the path to a healthy money relationship will never be smooth unless you are honest about your behavior and committed to changing your ways.
My guess is that you’ve been dating a while and not getting great results. You’re here reading this, after all. The best way to shift into having dates that render positive outcomes – like having more fun and eventually meeting The One – is to change the way you talk to yourself before you even leave the house.
Emotional infidelity might be described as an act, or acts, of disloyalty to your love relationship, to your partner, by becoming personally involved with another at an emotional, kind of care-taking, level. It's where the fine line between platonic and intimate is so thin, that you almost can't see it anymore. And your lover definitely can't!