First, I had to free myself, to realize it was okay to put myself first sometimes, that I had a right to life too. "Can you watch the kids tonight?" I'd ask Matt, slipping on earrings, off for a night out with girlfriends. Soon I started dressing better during oppressive Minnesota winters; thinking more; feeling engaged mentally even when I wasn't. Because as my peer group stretched, I got support, ears to listen, voices that identified; I didn't depend solely on Matt for validation or appreciation. And through that I found my voice.
How to keep the romance alive when you're a parent.
Early romance is such a powerful thing. You meet, fall in love and have a romantic courtship. You have your dream wedding, and a wonderful honeymoon. You want to spend every single moment together. Then the honeymoon ends and reality sets in.
Motherhood often means being on the receiving end of unsolicited, and unwanted, advice.
The moment you announce your pregnancy to the world, everyone and their cousin feels the need to tell you what's best for your child. It's one thing for a close friend to mention that you may want to reconsider your baby's soft-drink habit; but, it's quite another when a stranger feels the need to comment on how best to discipline your toddler. Here's what to do when you find yourself face-to-face with a wagging finger pointed at you and your child.
Most parents don't mention how hard sleep training is on marriage.
Letting my son cry it out has not been the main issue in our house. Instead, convincing his father that sleep training works has been an epic battle. Sleep training impacted our marriage, and my job, in ways that no sleep training guide prepared me for. Some light needs to be shed on the conversations that happen in the parents' bedroom while the baby cries.
Maternity leave standards, high-risk mom jobs and how to humiliate your child into straight As.
Here at LoveMom, we bring you the love. Our weekly Baby Bytes bring you everything else. Here are this week's 7 must-click mom links: what moms give up for motherhood, maternity leave standards throughout the world and one mom who embarrassed her child into better grades. These links, along with 7 tips on how to do it all as a single mom.
Jon & Kate may be reconciling. Are you considering it, too? How to protect the kids.
Most children of divorce secretly (or not so secretly) hope their parents will get back together. Having the family reunited and everything as it used to be may seem like a perfect resolution to many children but, in fact, reunifications can be difficult for everyone involved.
Life changes when you add kids to the mix. Sounds like a bulletin from the Department of the Obvious, I know, but you never really appreciate how true it is until you have actually have one around. Since becoming a step-mom, I have discovered a million little ways that my life is different, as well as a few big ways.
Still, having your family involved in child rearing can be a mixed blessing.
I wasn't sure how David would fare being so close to my family. He assured me it would be fine. I suspected that all he really wanted was to own hardwood floors. He had found us a house a mere four minutes from my parents' home that I wasn't thrilled with it but, ultimately, he convinced me that moving there would be best for both my nuclear and extended family.
One mother's quest to end to the unknowable mother syndrome.
Perhaps parents of my mother's generation weren't encouraged to share intimacies with their children. Or maybe it was just that way in her family. Which means that even now that she's 85, I still don't know my mother as well as I'd like. We get along, we have a lot of laughs together, but on the subject of herself, she's mom. When I began having kids, I wanted something different. I wanted my children to know me.
Why a couple's babymaking plans are none of your beeswax.
You could be doing childless couples a huge justice by refraining from an inquisition into their sex lives. Because, essentially, that's what you're doing when you push the baby issue. You're prying into their private world and poking in on their Should we or shouldn't we? Are we ready? Do we even want children? conversations.