Your photo might get you attention initially but it's not enough.
The Internet: Depending upon how you choose to use it, it can be a benign tool useful for expanding your social and romantic circle, or a hellish hosebeast whose thirst for ruined reputations knows no bounds. Basically, it's like Reese Witherspoon (wholesome, open, fresh) meets any of the trolls from any Real Housewives iteration (unbalanced and hell-bent on airing your personal business to anyone willing to listen to irrational nonsense.) So how does a classy lady network socially with dignity and self-respect? Tristan Coopersmith, relationship expert and owner of Menu Dating Online, advises that there are seven deadly sins women should avoid if they wish to maintain digital dignity.
This past week, tweeps everywhere crowded into the 92nd Street Y in New York City for the 2010 140 Characters Conference. For two days, people sat rapt, with smartphones and laptops at their sides, while live-tweeting panels on real-time news gathering, social media and education, tweetups and more. Our own Tom Miller—YourTango's General Manager and Tomfoolery blogger—joined author and dating coach Julie Spira to talk about Love, Dating and Romance in the Real-Time Web.
Are single women more likely to meet their husbands at work, online or out at bars? A recent Match.com study of 11,000 revealed that one in six surveyed met their wives or husbands online. Online dating trumped bars and clubs as the third most popular place to meet prospective dates, trailing only behind work/school (#1) and mutual friends (#2).
The cyber hand is for cyber hand-holding, only. What is the right age to get married? When do most people lose their virginity? Larry King to divorce for the 8th time. Eliot Spitzer set a personal record, of sorts, back in the day. What is he thinking when you're crying? How much does he care about what his friends think of you? Is it a violation of the bro code to date a best friend's ex? Twice as many youngsters have had a random hook up than a first date. Pausing to check Facebook during sex is something people actually do. The 10 sexiest movie super heroes. And YourTango is a Webby Honoree for Facebook Etiquette.
Last Monday, Lori Gottlieb—author of Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough—joined us in a live telechat hosted by the dating makeover coach Kira Sabin and our own Melanie Gorman. She joined women across the country who were tuning in via their telephones and submitted herself to our questions and pleas for love enlightenment. The meat of her message? We're not keeping ourselves open to love.
Online dating. Yes. We said it. And, as it so happens, we've done it, too. The once super taboo, let's-come-up-with-another-story-about-how-we-met form of meeting people is becoming ever more popular in a culture that has less and less free time and fewer real opportunities to be introduced to the right people. We do everything else online—so why not meet people there, too? To all you single-and-looking ladies out there who might think, "Uh, I'm not sure if I'm ready for that," hopefully we can help ease you into it. Because as weirded out as our parents (and even our own friends) may be by the idea, the Matches, eHarmonys, and OKCupids of the dating realm will only become ever more prevalent in the coming years, especially for working—and over-worked—professionals. What's more, your pool of singletons has grown even larger in the past year, thanks to an economy-in-shambles. With less money to spend on entertainment (and let's face it, more time at home for those unlucky enough to have lost their jobs), people are spending more and more time online than out and about. Instead of their local watering hole, singles are perusing the online personals for dates. What does this mean for you? It means you've got more talent to choose from than ever before. And when it comes to finding your match, choice means the difference between swooning and settling.