How, given our shortcomings, do we teach our kids right from wrong so they’ll actually listen?
When was the last time you preached to your kids about abstaining from behaviors in which you personally engage?
None of us is completely innocent when it comes to the adage, “practice what you preach”, and I don’t believe our kids expect us to be. The question is how, given our own shortcomings, do we teach our kids right from wrong so that they’ll actually listen, and at the same time view us as humans worthy of respect? I’ve found the following steps effective in dealing with this dilemma:
Do you even let them? Or are you too stuffy to laugh?
Do you allow your kids to give you the joy of laughter? Do you let yourself play long enough to get the joke? Do you even take the time to hear them when they are funny...even if they don't intend to be? Do you factor in the self confidence and self worth they derive when you express your appreciation for them through your laughter? Live a little—Laugh a little!
Giving your children an age appropriate and respectful explanation of your decision to split can even be a relief from the constant feeling of tension not knowing what could happen. The costs of living in an environment that always feels tense and strained is toxic for overall health and well-being.
I thought I'd share with you some of what I'm doing to change the world... at least what I hope to.
Someone once told me, "Lower your expectations of others and you'll be a much happier person."
Well that may be true, but it's not part of my makeup. I'm forever hopeful that others will care about and act on the things that I care about.
We all have missions we're on and have something we wish to share with others. I thought I'd share with you some of what I'm doing to change the world... at least what I hope to change.
Frogs Are Green
The working mom vs. stay at home mom debate is one that has gone on for decades. As a work-at-home mom, or WAHM, I lie somewhere in the middle. And while I am very thankful for this, I also want it to be said: WAHMing ain't easy.
Want a little Einstein around the house? The role of genetics in intelligence—i.e., the extent to which our smarts are inherited—has long been an academic war zone. What can raise your child's chances? There's no single best recipe, but studies prove that keeping TV out of the nursery, shelling out for music lessons, breastfeeding, having a big library, and withholding cookies are just a few ways to boost your child's chances of success.
Creating your own Advent calendar & other tips for making Christmas about memories, not presents.
Buy, buy, buy. I cringed that the verb was dominating my Christmas to-do list, and it wasn't even December yet. Looking back on my childhood, I remember magical moments with my family more than I remember specific gifts. I want my kids to have these kinds of memories, too, and not just a solid lesson in materialism...
Teach your kid the value of a dollar now and save yourself a lot of heartache down the line.
Whether it's a new toy, a new game, a new outfit, or a new adventure, it seems kids never stop asking their parents for more. And who can blame them? Some studies have shown that children see more than 25,000 ads a year-and that's just on television. Add in the internet, product placement and the pressure to have the same stuff as their friends, and you've got kids who are bombarded with the message that they need more of everything.
When he says, "let's live together," it means he's not fully committed.
The popular view is often not the truth, and cohabitation is one of those times. Living together prior to marriage is still one of the best predictors for divorce and if you have a child in that union prior to marriage you set them up for an unstable life. The latest research has found that for children, going through a divorce is more stable than being raised by a cohabitating couple. Many couples find someone with whom they can relate or have sex, and before you know what is happening they decide they will live together. They tell me or anyone listening that they want to make sure they are compatible.
Why children need childhood and what you can do to make sure they get it.
I was people-watching at a posh restaurant while waiting for my friend to join me. People with money, power, expensive clothes, cars, and dates arrived. I began wondering what I was doing; was the great food going to somehow make this display of affluence okay? I was underdressed and evaluating that in my mind, when all of a sudden I heard someone laugh. It wasn't the laugh that caught my attention, but rather the lack of laughter from most of the guests there. In fact, prior to her laugh, people had the right clothes and accessories, but none of them looked very happy. These people were what Sidney Sheldon would call social skeletons.
Appreciate your body now, travel with your spouse, shower alone, and more.
A few months before Lily was born, I jolted up from a rare, deep sleep. I'd been dreaming about a dinner of lobster and clam chowder and it was fantastic. The next weekend, I ate it. As I savored every bite, I wondered when on earth I'd be able to have another meal like that. It certainly wasn't the most child-friendly restaurant—would I ever eat there again? In six months? In a year? Five years?
