Are you giving yourself up to attempt to make someone else feel happy and secure?
A number of years ago, I had dinner with a lovely couple whom I met through a mutual friend. I connected with Allison (not her real name) immediately. Warm and open, I could see that she was a deeply caring woman. On the other hand, her husband Ken, while overtly charming, had a huge black hole inside that felt like a vacuum cleaner sucking the energy out of everyone. His need for attention was overwhelming to me.
Need some tough-love advice on your miserable dating life? Read on.
If you feel like you missed the class that taught everything you needed to know about dating and you just can't make these things called relationships work, you may be stuck in some unhealthy romantic patterns.
Before leaving your marriage, heal your end of your relationship system and see what happens!
Are you thinking of getting a divorce because:
Your spouse is physically or verbally abusive with you or with your children?
Your spouse is an alcoholic or drug addict and has no intention of dealing with the addiction?
Your spouse has a gambling addiction and is causing financial hardship?
You want to have a baby and you thought your spouse wanted a child too, but now says he or she doesn't?
Once you reach stability in your relationship, it's pretty common to start doing stupid things.
The beginning of a relationship is never boring. You're either excited to see the person, or anxiety-ridden because they've taken too long to text back. But once you're actually in a happy, stable relationship, it's pretty common to start doing some stupid things for fear of losing it. Like these.
Keep your separateness and autonomy and overcome addiction and dependency in love relationships.
Many couples become so enmeshed with one another that they become one. Each partner believes that their lover is necessary for life. Their relationship becomes everything to them. They forget their own individuality, becoming so preoccupied with making their relationship work. They forget about their own hobbies, family, friends, and everything else important to them. This is where the curse of codependency begins.
Domestic abuse advice: What to do when someone you love is in a violent relationship.
Every year, 1.3 million women are victims of domestic violence and one of them is my sister. While cases are severely underreported because of the fear and denial common in abusive relationships, the US Department of Justice estimates that 25 percent of women in the US are or will be a victim of domestic violence. Read one sister's story and find out what to do when someone you love is in a violent relationship.
The rumor mill thinks there is a very good chance that Brittany Murphy may have suffered an overdose. It's been further alleged that her husband Simon Monjack may have suffered from drug addiction. Until the autopsy returns, no one will be sure what happened but it's safe to say that codependency around drug use can be deadly.
Serial monogamy: dating with no breaks between relationships. Why is it becoming more common?
Despite the fact that humans are not naturally monogamous, there's something within us that seeks the companionship and stability one-on-one commitments offer. In a way, serial monogamy is a happy medium for many. Serial lovers get to express and explore these different components of their personalities with each relationship they try out.
Nagging can only go so far; ending bad habits takes compassion.
Nagging won't help; but a partner's unhealthy habit hurts more than his or her life expectancy. Taking on too much responsibility for a partner's bad habit is a classic sign of codependency‚ and an unhealthy dynamic in which one person becomes too wrapped up in the other. As she learns to cope with her husband's smoking; Meagan Francis also explores where his problem ends and hers begins. What does she find? "While it's OK to worry about a partner when they're doing unhealthy things, detaching from their habits—while keeping the lines of communication open—is key. Of course, there are some non-negotiables. Illegal drug use, heavy drinking, addictive gambling, and anything severely self-destructive may warrant a "quit or else" attitude. But for those not dealing with extreme cases, ultimatums aren't the answer, and neither is an expectation that your partner will comply with your wishes. Instead, use your mutual respect to reach a compromise."
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