Is a long self-improvement list stuck on your refrigerator so you won’t forget any of the flaws in your personality that need improving? Do you have it taped to your bathroom mirror? Have you shared your goals with a friend who checks with you every day to see how well you are doing? Do you have an internal “personal improvement list” so you can change your relationship, career, personality, weight, or any of the other myriad goals we humans strive to improve in our lives? How do these lists help you?
It’s late evening, the kids are in bed and you are unwinding after a long, stressful day at work. You’re flipping through the channels on TV and find a show that captures your attention for an hour, but every commercial seems geared towards food. Even though you just ate 2 hours ago, the clips of pizzas with multiple toppings and cheese-filled crusts or the batter-fried chicken and mashed potatoes with gravy are tempting you.
It seems like everything that we moms do is subject to intense scrutiny and judged by the "good-mom-eter." If we dare stray from the straight and narrow we are automatically cast aside as evil women who are neglectful at best, abusive for sure and likely to end up having to pay for years of therapy.
Regardless of their personal belief systems (spiritual focus, formalized religion, or a combination thereof), people tend to like the comfort of feeling connected to those beings that support us from the other side, whether we believe "the other side" to be an alternate universe, a heavenly realm, etc. One reason people find this so comforting is that they like knowing that something greater than themselves is available for them from which they can seek or receive guidance and clarity.
A personal experience with a young son reminds us to embrace growth and change. My husband and I took our son for his first official haircut when he was 15 months old. The trauma of the event was not significant, but the energy exchange during the event was decidedly intense. My son went from sitting on my lap and enjoying the process while my husband entertained him to the opposite end of the spectrum, screaming and struggling to be let down. As you can imagine, it was an emotional roller coaster for all three of us.
At Mars Venus Coaching we talk a lot about oxytocin and its many benefits. There’s nothing like the rush of oxytocin to fuel your day. As a mom, as a daughter, as a friend, as a business woman—it doesn’t matter what title is attached to your name as a female, what matters is knowing how to produce oxytocin for yourself.
I try to be a happy person and I really am the vast majority of the time. I am usually that annoying Pollyanna who thinks everything is going to be all right. My down times are few and far between, but, man, when they happen they are fierce.
Last night, I sat with my iPhone out on my bedside table. I was staring at it waiting for the text box to light up. It was an hour before my second (damn) date with Mark*, the best date-asker-outer known to woman. Although Mark had confirmed our date, even told me what time he would text me and offered to pick me up at my place, I couldn’t stop the dark cloud from approaching overhead. Love is a war that enacts violence on your heart. After so many years, I’ve ceased to be able to imagine peace. I am ruled by fear. My heart exists in a state of panic.
If you've ever been faced with a tight work deadline, cared for a sick loved one or struggled to pay the bills, you are well acquainted with stress — that overwhelming feeling that the world is demanding more than you can deliver. Unfortunately, stress isn't just exasperating; over time, it can wreak havoc on your emotional and physical well-being too.
Back in 1992 Dr. Gray provided an easy way to understand how men and women communicated differently. Back then if we wanted better relationships, we were encouraged to learn the other’s dialect so we could speak the same language. Now, in 2011, we understand the research behind why we communicate differently. The message is now more urgent than ever.
Remember these words: The poison is in the dose. They apply to all of the following nine items in this rogue's gallery of dangerous things we commonly do to relieve anxiety, stress and boredom. Every one of the following items has a split personality. They may be (and frequently are) a source of pleasure but all have the potential to wreck havoc with your life and health.
What is with this anxiety you feel every time you watch the evening news? Why do you feel like you have to be on hyper alert all the time or else something awful is going to happen? There's so much violence and crime in the world these days. Kids shooting kids, stalkers, rapists, drive by shootings, terrorist actions, murderers on the loose – you feel like you have to be scanning everything all around you all the time, trying to figure where the next onslaught of violence is going to come from so you can maybe hopefully protect yourself.
Do you feel constantly stressed out and on edge? Or are you tired of your partner having a short fuse with you? Is stress negatively affecting your relationships? Are you constantly arguing? Are you feeling tired and fatigued all the time? Are you having difficulty falling and staying asleep? Is stress making you sick or causing you to gain weight? Are you having trouble concentrating? Are you moody and irritable much of time?
Pinkee here~Personally I’m not that into New Year’s resolutions, but if you are I do have a recommendation. I know you’re thinking along the lines of getting in better shape or making more money in 2011, right? Or maybe you want to quit smoking, drinking, or eating junk food?
I am a big believer in the phenomenon that how you begin your year is how you will live your year. And as I recently learned from my acupuncturist Dr. Feng, there is an ancient Chinese proverb that says the exact same thing. That is powerful medicine. Think about it, how you decide to step into these first few weeks of January says a lot about the energy you will walk with the remaining 11 months.