Each day we have a chance to be who we want to be. Famous actor Daniel Day-Lewis, helps influence people to play multiple parts throughout their life and decide how it all turns out.
Therapeutic photography can be a useful tool in helping heal a distored self-image. In 2009, the New York Times published an article on this emerging practice of using images as a healing modality. The story, titled "Behind the Scenes: A Camera as Therapy", was written by professional photojournalist Alexandra Avakian.
The other day I was watching a TV interview with the famous British photographer Nigel Barker. He commented on how posing hides the real you while impromptu shots reveal the authentic self. Barker also mentioned how photography can be a useful tool in helping someone transform their self-image. Certainly the use of images can affect our sensory response.
One of the most challenging issues I confront in people who seek my help is perfectionism. These are people with very high standards who continually work to meet their goals-admirable qualities most would agree. When it is extreme, however, the relentless pursuit of achievement can lead to a great deal of misery for the individual and for the people in their lives. SIGNS OF A PERFECTIONIST
As I rule, I try to resist the pressure to write articles with holiday themes. It just feels a bit cliché and there are so many of them running rampant out there in cyberspace. Sometimes I feel the spirit that lies within our holidays gets lost within the onslaught of messages.
So here's the thing ladies . . . if you don't feel good about yourself, you will not feel good about a man or any relationship you create. You will not value yourself and what you have to offer. You will accept poor behavior because you do not feel good about you. You do not feel you deserve to be treated well.
I remember hearing about some research once that linked self-focus—thinking about yourself a lot and making things that happen out in the world about you in some way—with depression. The more you think about yourself, the more depressed you are. There are obviously a lot of missing variables here. This doesn’t mean that focusing on yourself causes depression or that depression causes self-focus. It just means that they are related in some way.
Apparently women’s brains resemble a superhighway while a man’s brain is more of a country road. I am no brain expert, merely quoting experts. http://healthyliving.msn.com/health-wellness/his-brain-her-brain-1 So why does brain matter matter? A man’s brain keeps thoughts in tidy little piles, and woman’s thoughts are all connected, and picked over. So a man already has compartments in his head and typically he has his “man cave” his hangout room in reality. The den or family room is
Angelina Jolie has been a big news item in the past few days. And rightfully so. To have both breasts removed, and next, her ovaries, is not the usual way we hear of women doing things to prevent cancer. But before I talk about what it means as a woman, let me say that her case is fairly unusual "because more than 99% of women do not have BRCA1 -- or BRCA2, for that matter." So hopefully, women will not begin to think this is something they should do to prevent breast cancer. Without the presence of BRCA1, the best prevention for all disease is to eat well (and I mean EXTREMELY well), exercise regularly, avoid stress, and be happy. Now I want to talk about the self-image and emotional perspective of what Angelina Jolie has brought to the forefront of thinking. Can a woman who has had her breasts removed still feel like a woman?
Since I began pulling out my hair over 20 years ago I do not remember one day that I did not pull at least one hair on my body out. Yes there have been times in which I had no bald spots, had all of my eyelashes, etc...but I still pulled. It was not for lack of trying. There was a time that I saw therapists, tried medication, and would even try to will myself to stop. Yet I kept right on pulling. I have a disorder called trichotillomania.
I wanted to love myself. I wanted something to change. After years of therapy, coaching and other healing work, the world began to look up. I was full of possibility. The secret that I kept close to me, hidden in the shadows for 31 years was now ready to be shared and I was ready to share it. I chose to bring my secret to the light. I wanted to celebrate It, and who I had become. I wanted to use It to help others – people like me, people who felt ashamed; men who felt embarrassed, and women who felt ugly.
All of us have secrets. We learn to live with them. We usually keep them close. And of all of them, there’s usually one biggie. One we hope and pray will never come out. But what are we so afraid would happen if others discovered our secret? Why do we hold it so tightly against our chests?
In the middle of a serious conversation a few weeks ago, my husband got up to get himself a cup of water. I was incensed! Here we were, having this serious discussion and he has a sudden urge for water that he couldn't control? In a fury I tell him, "I would never have done that to you!" I felt totally dismissed by him. You know what else he does? He sleeps when he is tired, and he goes to the bathroom when he has the urge. For women … these actions are revolutionary. For men, setting aside these needs would be insanity.
There are many books and articles that tell you all of the different things you should fix or change about yourself or be in order to find Mr. Right. You can read about what kind of clothing guys like. One school of thought will tell you to go after a guy if you are interested; another will tell you not to be too pushy. Then there’s even more information on how to act once you’ve met someone. It is so easy to be confused with all of this conflicting advice.
Every morning, when I’m hugging and kissing Isabelle good bye as she is leaving for school, we have a little ritual. I ask her 4 questions: 1. Who is worthy of everything wonderful? (She answers, “I am worthy of everything wonderful!) 2. Who loves and accepts herself EXACTLY as she is, right now? (She answers, “I love and accept myself EXACTLY as I am right now!)