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Why won't he tell me where he lives?!

Published on April 7, 2010 by its_rosie

My ex-boyfriend lives in NY, and we are supposedly still "friends." I bought a $300- non-refundable airline ticket to go see him in a few weeks, and I asked him to give me his address (since I would be staying with him). He refuses to give it to me! He says that he doesn't know why I need it because it isn't necessary, and I told him that my family wants to know where I am, and I should know where I'm going. Why would he be doing this?! The only thing I can think of is that he wanted to be mean and have me stranded at the airport when he didn't pick me up, and I wouldn't know where to go. I don't think he's that vicious, but it's the only reason that makes sense. Am I making too big of a deal out of this? Should I trust him when he says he'll pick me up at the airport? I don't have enough money for a hotel, so I can't afford to be stranded. I'm so confused!

ANSWERS

If I were you, I'd be freaking out too. Do you honestly think he would leave you stranded at the airport? Is that something this guy would do? And if he did, would you really want to stay at his house. But yeah, before you get on that plane you need his address. If he is playing a joke it isn't funny any more.

Maybe he is ashamed. Maybe he is hiding something. Maybe he is just teasing you. Only you know him. You have a history with him and you know how he behaves, so it's hard for me to say. But do get that address before you leave. What is more expensive? Losing out on $300 or $300 + hotel when he doesn't show.

Why are you staying friends with this person? Let alone visiting him? He doesn't sound reliable and if you're actually unsure of whether or not he's going to leave you stranded, it doesn't sound like the "friendship" is worth the trouble.

Well, I guess I'll never know. He got so pissed off at me (supposedly, but I think he was just using that for an excuse) wanting to know where he lived that he removed me from his Facebook friend list and told me not to go visit him. He sent me the meanest emails, too! I was crying all day at work, which I hate to do, and I'm still shaking. I have never done anything to hurt him and this is the millionth time he's hurt me. I should've known better. I don't know why he went off on me like this when he could've easily just told me not to come before I bought the plane tickets! Two days ago, he was making plans for sightseeing trips, and now he told me to f*ck off. I am so devastated. It will take me a long time to recover from this emotional pain.

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