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Give Advice: I Don't Think My Boyfriend Is Attracted To Me

Published on November 21, 2011 by sharnia88

I have been with my boyfriend for just over 2 years now and living with him for most of the time that we have been together. We are now building a house together. I love him very much and he loves me too. Our sex life was just like any other couples sex life to start off with. It was exciting and we couldn’t get enough of each other. Then things started to slow down. I would be the one who always wanted sex and then would be rejected. Which didn’t feel very nice. I tried sexy outfits but that didn’t seem to work either. Now, I have never been able to orgasm from sex and just using my hand or my boyfriend’s hand was even a struggle, so I prefer to use a vibrator. We do live in a house with other people so I understand that it is not always the right time to have sex, but when our house mates went away things didn’t improve. The only time that things do seem to improve is when he has been drinking. He becomes extremely horny and can last longer. Any suggestions on what is going on and how I could improve it without pressuring him more? As I feel like I have already pressured him.


I think there is more here than a lack of attraction to you - have you considered the reasons behind his drinking? This is often a cry for help. I would suggest getting him to see his doctor as soon as possible. There is a link between alcohol consumption and sexual difficulties. Also, what you have tried so far has only added to the stress of the situation. I do hope you can turn things around together.

My best regards

Ruby Binns-Cagney