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Why can't i move on from my ex.

Published on February 14, 2012 by makeitgoaway

My sons father and I split about 9 months ago, we were on and off for a few months after the big break. I wanted him back and he denied me, then he wanted me back and I denied him. Now he has a new girlfriend, they live together. and I just can't move on. I find really good guys, but they arn't good enough. I just miss him. I just want to be with him. HELP ME MOVE ON!! :(

ANSWERS

Getting over an ex can be very hard. Not only do they leave a space when they leave, we are also biologically primed to want to have them back. Basically our brain chemistry conspires to keep us missing them and wanting them. So doing activities with people you are close too can help rebalance your chemistry. In addition, you can't really let go of someone until you have mourned the past, AND also grieved over the hoped for future. Russell Friedman and John James give a step-by-step method for achieving this in their book "Moving On".

The only person who can help you move on is Yourself.

You need to WANT to move on in order to make this guy history. You were on and off, he denied you, then you denied him, what exactly are you missing here??? It's only the fact that he has someone new and that he's shacking up and playing house with them that makes him only SEEM desirable to you. The fact of the matter is, he's no longer invested in you like you are in clinging on to him.

You miss him now, yes. But once you put all of your energy and focus back onto YOU, you'll be having so much fun enjoying your life that soon enough, he'll be a long ago chapter that will only faintly come to memory once in a blue moon like all of our past relationships do.

You're not together now because there is someone far better for you out there and waiting. Don't be your own worst enemy. You're gonna be okay! Good luck :]

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