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Give Advice: Where did the romance go?!

Published on September 25, 2012 by cfedrick4593

Whenever I am with my boy friend I feel as if I am complete and I will never be happier. But when I am not with him I feel like there isn't much romance left. Maybe I am just confused. We have sex a couple times a week and each time we start out romantic but then it turns (for lack of a better word) wild. When we hang out he usually just wants to play video games. how can I get back that feeling I had when we were first dating? If it helps, we have been together for one year. Please help! -Cassie


HI Cassie,

I think what you are experiencing is normal.

Relationships are always changing. They never stay stuck in one stage (no matter how fun it is). In long-term relationships, that super-exciting, adrenaline infused stage eventually fades a bit and changes into a more permanent attachment stage. You still love the person, you just don't feel the same rush you once did upon meeting up with him: your heart pumping faster; sweaty palms; delight in the smallest things that he says and does.

That being said, however, you are the only one who can decide whether he really is long-term relationship material. Do you see yourself with him in 1, or even 5, years? Does he treat you the way you deserve to be treated? Even though that adrenaline rush may be gone upon meeting him, are you still really happy he's your special someone?

These are some of the questions you must ask yourself. And don't be worried that you are confused. That's normal too. Love is something many people find confusing ... you are not alone in feeling that way. Good luck & let me know how it goes.

Dear friend, We all have to work on our relationships and sometimes we need to put some extra effort to it. Apparently, your boyfriend is a bit immature and that requires initiative on your part to keep this romance going. You should try organizing some exciting dates or outings rather than spend time at his place and watch him play games. If this doesn't work, maybe is time to have a one on one conversation and take it from there. Just organize something fun that involves both of you and see how it goes. Good luck Yours truly AstroCoach

I am going to come at your question from a little different point of reference. I am reading your question and it really does concern me with the words you only feel complete when you are near him.. Those are warning bells really. You should as a woman stand strong and happy and confident all by your self. The man in your life should feel that strong in you and enhance what you are already.

If you have to change or be something you are not to get this mans attention I say Sweetie be strong and love your self. If that does not get his attention it will get someone's attention who will cherish you and want to spend time with you doing things of equal interest.

That is the smart and most loving thing you can do for your self. That way whether you are doing something together or when you are apart you will always be on his mind... and then watch out because of the fun you will have when you are together.. if you get my meaning.. hope this helps Delrae