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What to do...

Published on October 26, 2013 by raynaj1

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year. We've had the normal ups and downs of any relationship. The thing is, the downs have become more prevalent. He and I live in different cities (about a 25 - 30 minute drive from each other). Not bad at all. But, I have a car and he doesn't. It's a bit difficult because I am basically the reason why we see each other: I have the car! He's also very busy with school and work (he's in graduate school for journalism and is a freelance journalist). I try not to nag him but there are times when we only see each other once a week, this being one of those weeks. He complains often about me not being as accessible as he'd like (i.e. me living in his city). I continuously make myself available to him though. I wish he'd get a car too to take off the burden of me having to drive all of the time. My question is, how do I deal? Do I just stop being available to him and give him a taste of his own medicine?

ANSWERS

If he is not showing any sign from his side to make an effort to keep the relationship going, I'd be concerned and question his actions. I am in a relationship like that. I have no car, my girlfriend does. At the moment, I am taking care of my father dying of cancer, so we are 30 min away. I will drive to her whenever my sister or brother are over to help and watch my father. I drive my parents car, but otherwise, I'll take public transit to see her. She does the same for me. If one of us is not making an effort, it may be a sign of dwindling interest.

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