Oooohhh...tough one that. The first thing I can think of is that you might want to take the focus away from your emotions making you both feel like doing the deed. Emotions play a big part, but a lot of people confuse sex with emotional intimacy, and they are two very different things. Emotional intimacy comes from trust, understanding, and communication with your partner. Sex can help the intimacy to grow, but isn't a definite way of doing things.
You both have a goal in mind...to wait after marriage. That is an important choice that you both have made. So help each other with that choice. Things will get hot and heavy from time to time...its human nature. However, you can both choose to cool things down and not let it get too far.So both of you need to play chaperone on this. Sometimes you might ask for the cold shower time-out, other times she will.
To help this out, try to avoid spending too much time in private places, like each other's rooms or anything like that.
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