YOUR VOTE2 0
Unsure in relationship
I'm really confused about my relationship and need an impartial view. We started out as co workers he is 12 years older than me and has a son, I was in an unhappy relationship that was coming to an end and apparently his was too. My relationship broke up and my co worker admitted his feelings for me but was with a woman he'd been in a long term relationship with ( not his sons mother). We remained as close friends as ever but eventually it developed into more. We began seeing each other ( im ashamed but it happened) and he said he would leave but had to take it slow as his son was a priority. We stopped seeing each other while he figured things out but remained close and couldn't get much distance as we work together every day. He went on a holiday with his girlfriend and while he was away I started to see a friend of mine casually but on his return from the holiday he broke up with his girlfriend and had no where to go, so of course he came to me and I let him move in and ended my casual relationship as we had not seen much of each other anyway. From there it snowballed. He needed a place to bring his son on weekends but didn't want us to meet yet so I'd stay away on weekends and eventually we decided to leave my lovely 1 bed flat for a bigger place so that his so could have room. Fast forward a couple of years and I feel trapped, he's lovely and treats me well and says that this is the happiest he's ever been but I miss my flat and alone time, the freedom and lack of responsibility as we have his son a few times a week. I ain't that my eye has been wondering and I'm fantasising about younger guys. I've also been talking to the friend I was seeing before my boyfriend and he's full of regret that we didn't try harder and get together as he thinks we'd be a great couple and says he loves me. I'm trying to leave him out of the equation as this should have no bearing on my relationship with my boyfriend but I feel it is clouding my judgement and I'm shutting down a bit emotionally which my bf has noted. We talked about it and he said he wants what's best for me and I told him I'm scared, we're always together at work and home and have a house and car that we couldn't afford separately. I'm worried, do I try harder to save this or end it and hurt him and have to work with him everyday? I don't know if I'm thinking the grass is greener but could lose a lovely guy for the sake of a little wanderlust. I'm so confused.