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Unaccepting of new experiences

Published on December 7, 2010 by desdemona

My loving boyfriend, who is the most wonderful person, reacts very negatively whenever I try something new in bed. The other night, he was too tired for sex, so I decided to try and masturbate with him in bed beside me. But instead of being turned on or participating, he turned away and said that it was weird. This reaction really upset me and I told him and he apologized, but it wasn't the first time his reaction in bed upset me. Once when I introduced new lube, he said that it was too sticky. He is perfect in every other way, but unless things change in the bedroom, I fell like the relationship is doomed. What should I do, especially since he avoids talking about feelings and confrontation like the plague? Help!

ANSWERS

hes gay. get him a boyfriend for the holidays. u need a man who can sexually use your body.

It sounds like your bf is a conservative guy sexually. There are lots of possible reasons for that, but the trick is to coax him gently into deeper waters. You might try asking him if he has any sexual fantasies, then act on what he says. You could also try lighter forms of sexual adventure, like a new position or texting him naughty innuendos. He also might have a "virgin/"whore" complex, where he wants his gf to be "pure" and saves his naughty side for his fantasies. In that case, I'd recommend getting "The Good Girl's Guide to Bad Girl Sex" by Barbara Keesling.... not because you don't know how to have "bad girl sex", but you can leave the book out for him to see and maybe even read relevant paragraphs (especially the part when she says there's nothing wrong with having bad girl sex!!) I hope this helps!

We dont likme to talk about feelings.but u have to make him stop being a coward,n talk about his issues in order for him to change

My advice would be to be the one to initiate the change. Men find it hard to talk about these things, and are much better at action, so if you switch it up first he may follow through. Try role playing and getting him in the mood before talking to him. And instead of "talking" Maybe take POST IT'S and write what you want done, and stick it where you want it.
If this does not work, then you have to sit down and let him know what it means to you a boring sex life is never good for a healthy relationship Good luck meetmeninny.com

My advice would be to be the one to initiate the change. Men find it hard to talk about these things, and are much better at action, so if you switch it up first he may follow through. Try role playing and getting him in the mood before talking to him. And instead of "talking" Maybe take POST IT'S and write what you want done, and stick it where you want it.
If this does not work, then you have to sit down and let him know what it means to you a boring sex life is never good for a healthy relationship Good luck meetmeninny.com

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