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Is there anyway to deal with someone who is a narcisistic?

Published on April 28, 2009 by the decorator

I have only been married for 18 months and is has been downhill ever since. He doesnt work and has a reason, he searches for women online and has a reason, he is just lazy and has a reason. Help!!!!

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Yes, you do need help. Not a good situation by any means. If he doesn't realize he is part of the marriage and has adult responsibilities then he needs to make an appointment with a counselor who will tell him like it is. If he is looking for online relationships how commited is he. A good question for him. Good luck.

Yeah. I say it's time to commence the marriage counseling. If he won't go, you can go by yourself. There are lots of churches and non-profits that give counseling for cheap or free.

Hello There...So sorry to hear about your marriage....I was married 39 years, had to leave, he was negative, a good man..but he was jealuse of my happiness with in...he was a good provider....but negativity is not good for us.. sounds like you husband has some issues with working and caring for you... not good.... the only way it will get better, if hes aware of his problem, and get help....hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...if he choses not to then get out for it will get worse..... remember we teach people how to treat us......you probbly love him, i understand that.....but real love is not selfish..take care sincelerly Barbie Ann

I THINK YOU NEED TO REALLY THINK ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP. YOU REALLY ARE STILL NEWLY WEDS. THIS SOUNDS LIKE A MAJOR PROBLEM TO ME. IT SOUNDS LIKE HE THINKS HE IS STILL SINGLE. IF THAT IS THE CASE YOU NEED TO FIND HELP FOR THE 2 OF YA. IF HE'S NOT WILLING THEN YOU CAN MAKE HIM. I JUST WANT TO POINT OUT THAT YOU NEED TO THINK ABOUT YOUR HAPPINESS. IF YOU CAN'T MAKE THINGS BETTER AND HE DOES NOT SEE A PROBLEM AND WANTS THINGS TO STAY THE WAY THEY ARE WOULD YOU BE HAPPY LIVING YOUR LIFE THAT WAY? WAS HE THAT WAY BEFORE YOU MARRIED HIM? DO YOU WANT TO WAKE UP ONE MORNING AND SAY WHAT HAVE I DONE? WHY HAVE I WASTED MY LIFE? I WOULD GO TALK TO A COUNSILER, PRIEST OR SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP YOU WITH YOUR EMOTIONS AND POSSIBLE HELP THE 2 OF YOU.

He has other issues going on besides Narcissistic behavior. There are really good books on the subject of narcissistic behavior. Amazon or the library are good places to find these books. You may not be able to see him though to getting the help he needs; however you can read and learn for yourself and make you wiser and stronger. I was married to a narcissist. I could not help him. I could not change him. He could not see the problem. One thing I know we cannot make people be something they are not. Can you live with him as he is? If the answer is no, and he is really a true Narcissist, then there is not much hope for change. Seek counsel first!

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