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Should I start a relationship with a guy at work?

Published on May 13, 2009 by brennalu

There is this guy at work that I have amazing chemistry with, we laugh and 'get' eachother... He is interested as am I as we have talked about it but I just don't want to wrek what we have The tension is so hard to deal with sometimes....

ANSWERS

I think it really depends on where you work and how close you are at work. Does your company encourage this or frown on it? Could it affect your job, your status, promotions etc. My work place actually encourages work relationships and there are many happily and not so happily married couples here. (I work in Law Enforcement). You have to address several pitfalls with work relationship. If it doesn't work out, you have to see this guy every day - and possibly work for him. Also, there is the jealousy issue. What if you see him being personable with other women. How would you handle this? Could this lead to you losing your job. Bad economic times for that! Bottom line, the work part will really complicate any relationship the two of you could have. I personally never date anyone from work and keep my personal relationships private from my work place.

I got involved with someone at work. IT ended badly. I had to see him almost every time I had a shift. Ticked me off to no end. And then he got involved with another coworker. It was ugly. I agree with Karen, you should really think it through. It may work out, but prepare yourself for if it doesn't.

Karen does give some really good food for thought, but I'll go on the side of "sure, why not?" I have dated co-workers before, but I also made sure to discuss with them the "what-ifs" it does end and how we continue to work together after that. These discussions gave me a pretty accurate way of measuring if they could actually stick to their word and continue to have a healthy work relationship if our relationship ended. I had no problems with them when the relationship was over and we'd see each other at work, and neither did they. We are still friends to this day as well. So really, look at the relationships you've had. Are they messy and explosive when they end, or is it amicable and (maybe) friendships resume or begin at some unspecified length of time afterwards? How about him? Can he answer these questions as well? You both will need to discuss all of this if you are really concerned with your jobs being affected by your relationship.

I met my boyfriend at work and now we live together! But we were best friends for 2 years before that. Like you, we weren't sure if we wanted to risk our friendship for something more. But we went for it and it's been great! Aside from what others have already said, I would ask yourself if your work environment will affect your relationship. I happen to work at a very gossip-y place and on more than one occasion the rumor mill has caused a few arguments. We've since learned t distance ourselves from it. If your coworkers tend to mind their own business you should be OK!

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